Mom Nails Why Kate Middleton Doesn't Have It Easier Than Us -- Even If It Looks Like It

kate middleton birth photo

Yesterday, Kate Middleton, the Duchess of Cambridge, gave birth to her third child. Hours later she appeared before the cameras with her husband, Prince William, and new son, looking fresh as a daisy, blow-dried and made up and in heels. Some were wowed by her superhero-like recovery and teased her for her easy breezy life. But as one mom on Facebook reminded us, that is a dirty, dirty lie.


Laura Mazza of Mum on the Run posted some real-talk about Middleton on Facebook yesterday, writing, "Poor Kate has copped a lot of sh*t about having nannies and a beauty team so she has nothing to worry about, having emerged looking flawless with her new baby boy." And indeed she has. The Irish Times, for example, posted an article yesterday titled, "Childbirth is a great leveler, but not if you're Kate Middleton." In it, the writer mused, "How much lovelier would it have been if she had betrayed even the smallest hint of the brutality of the experience she had just endured?"

Prince William and Kate Middleton
Chris Jackson/Getty

But is that really what we want? For this woman to walk out of the hospital, hobbled and sweaty in sweatpants and a tear-stained shirt? She's a public figure. She's royalty, y'all. I wouldn't want the entire planet to see me like that; why should we expect it from her? And, more to the point, do we have any doubt that she went through the same hell the rest of us went through? The answer, as Mazza writes, is no:

"I bet, just like the rest of us, her Vagina feels like it's been punched up by Mike Tyson and looks like a sad lasagna ... and probably feels like everything is about to fall out and the only thing holding her together is a giant pad and an adult diaper. I bet she rolled her eyes before she opened the door, the way you do when unwanted relatives visit you after you’ve given birth and demand coffee and biscuits."

Think about it. She has to show up for the world after what is an incredibly painful, exhausting, bloody, and leaky experience, put a smile on her face, and wave to the people? Let the woman have her mascara, for God's sake!

As moms, we know exactly how she's feeling right now. Just because she got to wear a nice dress doesn't mean she had it any easier than we did. As Mazza puts it: "I bet she's feeling just like all of us ... screwed but blissfully happy. The only thing is, is that she has to pretend that it's all good and she's strolled out of that hospital like she hasn't just pushed a giant pineapple out of a keyhole! So I think in fairness to her, she has it harder keeping up appearances."

And plenty of people agreed with Mazza's post:

kate middleton facebook comment
Mum On the Run/Facebook

As one person pointed out, she's damned if she does keep up appearances and damned if she doesn't.

kate middleton facebook comment
Mum On the Run/Facebook

So let's lay off Kate. Nothing about that post-hospital fashion show seems even remotely appealing. Why do we need her to be "leveled" by childbirth? So she can prove she's not any better than us? Please, people. Live your life. Let her go home, change her diaper, and put her feet up for the .2 seconds she'll have before she has to deal with the two small children she already has in addition to her newborn. A mom's life is never easy.

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