This Mom Wins the Holidays for Her Brutally Honest Christmas Card


The holiday season can be a great time to reflect on the past year and share your family's highlights with loved ones. However, these shimmering recaps often come with posed, filtered snapshots, and only focus on the best moments from the year. So while they typically look and sound perfect, they often aren't the daily reality. Instead of projected an ideal facade, one mom got real with her family's holiday card -- and her sassy truthfulness is what makes this "honest" Christmas greeting beyond perfect. 


According to a now-viral snapshot of their family's Christmas card insert that was shared on Mommy Needs Vodka's Facebook page, Tom and Lisa Allen are the proud parents of three kiddos who have had quite the busy year. The update starts with Landon, their "precocious and super annoying" 3-year old. In addition to whining all of the time, this little one spent all of 2017 refusing to go to sleep when he was told and crying whenever he didn't get Gushers after dinner. "Most of the artwork he brings home from church nursery is awful," the proud parents brag. "Our pride and joy (and source of our drinking problem)."

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Next up is Hunter, and this little boy has had an equally exciting year. "Our energetic yet surprisingly unathletic 9-year-old who just got cut from a soccer team that doesn't even keep score in their games, I know ... how does that even happen?! Spends most of his time on his iPad and said his first swear word this year," his folks wrote. "Super exciting!"

Their oldest, Maddy, has arguably had the busiest year of all. In addition to getting fired from her job at Sephora for telling her boss, "Just because I'm on the schedule doesn't mean I have to show up," she now has a new life goal: dropping out of school to become Insta famous.  "Age 18 ... goes over her data each month on her cell phone," her parents added. "Was grounded for two weeks this fall after she snuck a guy in her window to 'watch a movie.'" 

Lastly, it's the proud parents' turn. Tom and Lisa lovingly share that they're "somehow still married" 41 years later, after all they've been through. "Tom still tucks his T-shirt into his jeans and just took money from our retirement account to buy a fishing boat," Lisa shared. "His golf shoes are still currently on the steps after I told him three times to take them upstairs."

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People are loving this savage note, and it's easy to see why: 

The only thing missing? An update on Lisa. Well played, Mama! 

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