Stay-at-Home Mom Finds Out What Her Salary Could Have Been & Her Response Is Perfect

stay at home mom blogger
The Tuna Chronicles/Facebook

Being a stay-at-home mom is a unique experience that comes with its own highs and lows. While many moms love being at home with their kids, they're often also faced with an immense amount of guilt regarding their decision. One huge source of that guilt comes from thoughts about career opportunities they've passed up and "what could have been." It's easy to get caught up in ideas about what you're missing out on, but when blogger Rasha Rushdy got an email letting her know how much money she could be making if she wasn't a stay-at-home mom, she tackled the issue perfectly.


Rushdy, who blogs at The Tuna Chronicles, has been a full-time stay-at-home mom to her two kids for about three years, which is why she experienced a bit of a shock when she received an email from a recruiting company that went so far as to send along a rough estimate of the salary she'd be making if she was still working.

More from CafeMom: Stay-at-Home Mom Fires Back at Haters Who Say She Doesn't 'Work'

In an emotional Facebook post, Rushdy says that the email took her "on a trip to a parallel universe in which I wasn't [a mom] -- I'd never been one." 

The mother said that as she scrolled further through the email, her mind began to wander. "My mind started racing down that path a little further: the title I could have held by now; the places I could have travelled to with my job and the experience I could have gained," she wrote. "And then, almost simultaneously, the 'I wouldn't haves' came hammering down, one after the other."

stay at home mom blogger
The Tuna Chronicles/Facebook

From the not-so-subtle changes to her body post-pregnancies to the ever mounting anxieties that come along with being a mother, she started to imagine how "easy" things would be if she'd chosen a different path.

"I wouldn't have half-moons quite this puffy under my eyes.

I wouldn't have those scars, or those irreversible, yet hard-to-exactly-identify changes in my body.

I wouldn't have that gap in my resume, on which, although it is the greatest and most important work I have done, society has yet to place the right value.

I wouldn't have the worries and anxieties that I do about re-entering the workforce - have I forgotten everything? Has my brain turned into mush? How will I ever balance it all?

I wouldn't have any of that."

But, she wrote, she wouldn't go back on her choices or trade her life with her kids for anything -- because she's gained so much more than the salary she gave up.

"I wouldn't have them," she wrote. "Them. The ones I'm responsible for raising, nurturing, and loving. The ones who test my patience in a way I never could have imagined. The ones who have turned a mirror inwards and forced me to grow, just when I thought I was already a grown-up and had it all together ... I wouldn't have learned what limitless really means. You think you love them, and then another day passes, and the well of your love burrows further into the rich earth of your heart. You think you can't anymore, and another terrible, sleepless night passes, and somehow, you can, again."

"You think you couldn't ask for one more ounce of joy," she adds, "and then you watch them grow into their future selves, you get a flickering preview into the depths of their characters, and you know, there is no limit to this."

Rushdy admitted that while she may dream about the salary she could have made or trips she could have gone on, she doesn't feel as though her choice to become a stay-at-home mom has held her back.

"Giving up my former career, for now, for them, has not limited me," she said. "It's changed things, sure, and it'll influence the curves and bumps in my path going forward. But I'll take it -- every last little bit -- because there is no way I'm giving up what their existence has given me."

More from CafeMom: 'Stay at Home Mom' Isn't My 'Most Important Job' -- Stop Saying It Is

For stay-at-home moms, Rasha Rushdy's words should serve as a comforting reminder that while it's natural to reminisce, you never have to feel bad or guilty for the choices you make for yourself and your children.

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