Parenting

16 Times Schools Shamed Girls for Wearing Perfectly Normal Clothes

ParentingPublished May 19, 2017
By Jeanne Sager
dress code violationsquebot/Instagram; emmmmkayyyy/Instagram; Rose Lynn/Facebook

It's a story that's becoming all too familiar: A girl goes to school in an outfit she loves that's garnered her parents' approval. And then there's a phone call home. She's been "dress coded" at school -- judged by teachers or administrators (and often both) as dressed inappropriately for a school setting. 

Yes, boys can be subjected to ridiculous school rules too, but an increasing number of girls have been speaking out in recent years to challenge dress codes that tend to be more restrictive for female students than their male peers. 

Often it's those male peers that many school administrators call to mind when lecturing female students. One Michigan principal went viral in 2015 for stating dress codes are made to protect girls from becoming "sex objects."

"Being wired more visual, males are attracted to shape and skin," Jim Bazen said in his now infamous rant. "Yes, a lot of bare skin or tightly covered (Spandex!) skin is a sexual distraction to a male. He will say, the more skin the better ... but this leads him to treat women as 'sex objects' rather than respect her for who she is. So, it would seem to me, that if you do not want women treated as 'sex objects,' you should tell them to cover more skin."

The attitudes are unfair both to boys who are perfectly capable of existing in a classroom with a girl's clavicle without ripping her clothes off and ravishing her, and to girls who are being held responsible not just for their own bodies but boys' too. 

Still, some say dress codes are there to protect students, so we decided to take a look at just what students are being protected from. Behold the outfits that schools have deemed wanting ... and for which girls lost precious class time to be lectured, forced to change, and in some cases threatened with severe punishment.

1/16
The Long Arms-placeholder
The Long Arms
Catherine Pearlman/The Family Coach

The Long Arms

When Catherine Pearlman's daughter was forced to change out of these shorts because they violated middle school policy, she wrote the principal a letter offering him the chance to take her daughter shopping for something that would pass muster. Among the issues said administrator would have to deal with? "She is 5’7” and 13 years old. Built more like her father, she has exceptionally long legs and arms."

So much for that fingertip rule, huh?

2/16
Leggings Or Pants?-placeholder
Leggings Or Pants?
Erica Edgerly/Facebook

Leggings Or Pants?

When a teen was sent home for wearing this long shirt and leggings (because the school said the leggings do not qualify as pants), her sister posted this angry -- and soon viral -- rant on Facebook: "People wonder why women feel insecure about their bodies or what they wear.. And it's because you're told your clothing is inappropriate when you're completely fully clothed, even when you're not showing cleavage or anything. How about instead of body shaming women, school systems should start teaching 15-18 year old boys to stop degrading women with their eyes and contributing to the rape culture of today's society."

3/16
The Scandalous Shoulders-placeholder
The Scandalous Shoulders
Beret Nearing

The Scandalous Shoulders

It was 83 degrees out the day before Beret Nearing's daughter wore this outfit to school, and Nearing got a call telling her that her daughter's tank top was "inappropriate." What you can't see? The teen was actually wearing a second tank top underneath this one!

More from CafeMom: 15 Ways We Can Teach Our Daughters to Love Their Bodies

4/16
Clavicle Conundrum-placeholder
Clavicle Conundrum
scribbledrips//Instagram

Clavicle Conundrum

This third grader got in trouble for showing her clavicle. Third grade. As her mom wrote on Instagram, "WTF: are they afraid of her 9 year old shoulders or something...?!"

5/16
Baring ... What?-placeholder
Baring ... What?
quebot/Instagram

Baring ... What?

What's wrong with this outfit? Well, according to this girl's school, the skirt is four inches above the knee, and that's just not okay ... despite the leggings underneath (and her mom's measurements which clock it at three inches above the knee). In an angry Instagram share, her mom pointed out, "They interrupted her day and mine requiring a change of clothes. She felt shamed, embarrassed, and angry. This was a huge disruption in her day. Not only does this remind me of the priorities in the public school system, but it was yet another hetero-norm social construct that shamed my daughter for being a girl. This is not ok. This will not stand."

6/16
A Lot Going On?-placeholder
A Lot Going On?
rmgilmoreauthor/Instagram

A Lot Going On?

Although she'd worn it to school with no prior incident, administrators told this girl she had "a lot going on there you don't need to show off" when she showed up at school in this Star Wars–themed top with another tank top on beneath it. 

"This is a good kid who missed 15 minutes of a science power point to change. Boys cat call in the hallways. Touch her inappropriately. Make sexual advances toward her. And the school is worried about her white tank top? This is public education. This is our tax dollars," her mom wrote on Instagram.

7/16
Not Uniform-placeholder
Not Uniform
fandom.kitty/Instagram

Not Uniform

Despite looking like a school uniform, this outfit was labeled inappropriate ... by a school.  "Is this inappropriate or are men once again punishing women for their own personal problems?" asks this girl's mom on Instagram. GOOD QUESTION.

More from CafeMom: 16 Gorgeous Flower Braid Styles for Moms & Daughters

8/16
Suspension Shorts?-placeholder
Suspension Shorts?
bubbles.334/Instagram

Suspension Shorts?

This teen was threatened with in school suspension if someone didn't bring her a new pair of shorts to wear.

9/16
Is That Your -- Gasp! -- Collarbone?-placeholder
Is That Your -- Gasp! -- Collarbone?
Stacie Dunn/Facebook

Is That Your -- Gasp! -- Collarbone?

Stacie Dunn was forced to bring her daughter a scarf to cover up her offending clavicle in this outfit ... but the teen was sent home anyway as administrators didn't like her attitude. 

More from CafeMom: 12 Powerful Photos That Show There's No One Way to Be a Boy

10/16
Like Mother/Like Daughter-placeholder
Like Mother/Like Daughter
Amy Redwine/Facebook

Like Mother/Like Daughter

Amy Redwine's daughter Violet was sent home from school for wearing a dress she'd worn several times before ... so Amy decided to wear it to Violet's graduation to show how perfectly appropriate it was for a school setting.

11/16
Is This Better?-placeholder
Is This Better?
Rose Lynn/Facebook

Is This Better?

When Rose Lynn was sent home for a shirt that wasn't long enough -- despite a cardigan she was wearing over it -- she decided to give her school another option.

12/16
Twins?-placeholder
Twins?
emmmmkayyyy/Instagram

Twins?

Notice anything about the shorts these girls are wearing? Yup, they're the same shorts ... and yet only one girl was told she was violating the school dress code for wearing them the day this photo was taken. 

More from CafeMom: 24 Secret Texting Abbreviations Every Parent Needs to Know

13/16
Double Standard-placeholder
Double Standard
roseyabu/Instagram

Double Standard

When the teen on the left got in trouble for her "short" dress, her mom shared a side-by-side highlighting what boys at the same school are allowed to wear.

14/16
Holey Moley-placeholder
Holey Moley
Angela Asbury Oldham/Facebook

Holey Moley

A "free the thigh" protest broke out after outfits like this got girls in trouble at Washington's Aberdeen High School.

15/16
Not at the Knee-placeholder
Not at the Knee
KaitlynChana/Twitter

Not at the Knee

Even though this girl's baby doll dress was paired with a set of leggings, she was punished by her school because the dress didn't hit her knees. To make matters worse, the child's mom said her daughter was threatened with a tardy slip because her mom couldn't make it to school in time for her to change before classes began.

16/16
Time for a (Policy) Change-placeholder
Time for a (Policy) Change
CaleighSykes/Twitter

Time for a (Policy) Change

A school policy at Kansas' Lansing Middle School was changed after this sixth grader's outfit got her in trouble because leggings were not considered "appropriate school wear."

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