If Your Husband Doesn't Want to Have Sex, It's Your Baby's Fault

feetOMG. If you're wondering what the hell happened to your sex life since your baby arrived, then I've got some great news for ya. The reason you aren't getting down and dirty with your hubby as often as you'd like isn't because he doesn't love you or isn't attracted to you.

Nope. According to a study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, dads have a lower sex drive after a newborn enters the picture. Almost one in five new dads reported not getting it on for a good three months after junior made his arrival.


Yep, apparently they're just as worn out, exhausted, and overwhelmed as we are, which makes getting down and dirty between the sheets a lower priority than normal. And another reason dads are hesitant to take the plunge? They're worried about our physical condition -- you know -- down there. (Yikes!)

Isn't this like, the best news ever? I can't speak for every new mom, but when I had my son? Um, let's just say sex was not something that occurred in my household until he was at least six months or so. After gaining 50 pounds during pregnancy, having a 24-hour labor complete with an episiotomy (sexy), and being so tired I could barely function after bringing our son home -- sex was the last thing on my mind.

And my husband didn't seem too interested in it or worried about it either, which I can now blame on the fact that his libido took a beating with the birth of our kiddo. It had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I was fat, unattractive, bitchy, insert any other not-so-pleasant term here.

He simply didn't want to do it like a couple of teenagers because he didn't feel like it. Period. I was not involved in this equation at all -- or at least that's what I'm going to tell myself based on this research.

And you know what? You should too. For once, a lack of sexual activity is not our fault anymore -- suddenly we're not the party poopers when it comes to bedroom action, and something about that feels so ... good.

Honestly though, considering just how much a newborn throws any parent's life into a state of complete chaos -- sex is probably the last thing we need to be concerned with. Instead of stressing over how often it's happening and whether or not it's exactly like you remember it, just focus on getting used to life with a baby and savor every single second of new parenthood -- because it goes by so quickly.

There will be plenty of time to resume normal sexual behavior down the road. At some point, you won't be able to use the kid as an excuse to get out of it anymore. (Take the hiatus while you can, ladies.)

Does your husband seem to have a lower sex drive now that you have a baby?


Image via Melissa Mercier/Flickr

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