There's a Guide for Men on How To Survive Hallmark Christmas Movies

Crown Media United States LLC/Photographer: Fred Hayes

David O'Donnell & Candace Cameron Bure in 'Christmas Under Wraps'
Crown Media United States LLC/Photographer: Fred Hayes

Although we personally believe that Hallmark Christmas movies are for everyone, apparently, there are some men out there who don't enjoy sitting down to watch them with their wives and girlfriends. But fortunately, help is here. There's a guide for men on surviving Hallmark movies floating around -- so for any dudes out there trying to figure out how to get through these movie marathons, this might be a little helpful. 

And if nothing else, it definitely brings the LOLs. 

  • Golf Digest published a list of helpful tips and reminders for gents about Hallmark movies ... and it's pretty spot-on.

    Mike Dopud, Teryl Rothery a Christmas Duet
    Crown Media United States LLC/Photographer: David Dolsen

    Need an example? Practically every Hallmark movie is the same. Even though we'd argue there are some distinct differences, yeah, the plots are pretty similar -- but that's why we love them!

    The article points out that "the script follows one of two plots: A busy, busy businesswoman/man with truculence towards the holiday spirit is sent to a small town where Christmas is everything [or] community center or business is in danger of being closed." 

    Yep, that's about right.

  • Advertisement
  • The article also warns against making fun of the movies, which is for the best. 

    Candace Cameron Bure in 'A Shoe Addict's Christmas'
    Crown Media United States LLC/Photographer: Steven Ackerman

    "You're not watching characters in a play; the spiritual and emotional connection your significant other has with these holiday films is stronger than any bond you two will ever enjoy," the author pointed out.

    Yep, this is true -- it's so easy to get sucked in and emotionally involved! The writer also cautioned against mocking Candace Cameron Bure, naming her the "Samuel L. Jackson of Hallmark movies" because of how often she appears in them.

    Totally accurate. Back off of DJ Tanner!

  • And then, perhaps the most useful tip of all: Watch out for crying.

    Alicia Witt, Mark Wiebe in 'A Very Merry Mix-Up'
    Crown Media United States, LLC/Photographer: Ben Mark Holzberg

    It's true. There's just something about these movies -- and the spirit of the holiday season, of course -- that can really get those tears flowing, and the last thing we want is someone mocking us for it! 

    "My wife didn't shed a tear at our wedding and was pretty stoic when she went through some health troubles a while back. But no matter how many times she sees Candace find true love on Christmas Eve in the town square during a lighting ceremony, it's like she's watching a dog be put down," noted the guide. "I'm not sure what the right response is to this. But heed my words. Asking 'Why are you crying?' is not it." 

    LOL! Funny, but true. So, so true.

  • Men should definitely follow these rules. After all, it'll only make our viewing experience more pleasant. 

    Briana Evigan & Paul Campbell in 'Once Upon a Holiday'
    Crown Media United States, LLC/Photographer: Marcel Williams

    But if they don't want to watch? Well, we don't need them to have a good Friday night in with some Hallmark movies, a bottle of wine, and the Christmas lights on. 

    After all, there's only a small part of the year where holiday viewing is socially acceptable. We've gotta milk it for all we can! 

hallmark christmas movies