How Do You Know When Someone's Lying to You?

Suzanne Murray
how to tell if someone's lying

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I have a friend who can't lie—but she doesn't know it. It's not that she lies a lot, but anytime she does I can read it all over her face. Once she told me that she couldn't get away for the weekend because she was going to her grandmother's 90 birthday party. The problem is, her grandmother's 90th birthday party had taken place several months before.

I guess she doesn't think that I remember details of her life. The real reason she couldn't get together? She had to watch her roommate's dog for the weekend (so that her roommate could go away) and she was embarrassed about telling me because her roommate was constantly taking advantage of her. I didn't call her on her lie then—nor have I ever said anything when I know she's been lying to me.

I'm usually pretty good at knowing when someone is lying to me, although I did have a college boyfriend who lied about absolutely everything—even the classes he was taking. I was often confused about things he did or said. None of it made sense until I found out he was a pathological liar, and then everything made perfect sense.

According to experts there are 7 ways you can tell if someone is lying:

1. They blink a lot

2. They hesitate when talking 

3. They'll look you in the eye (these days, liars are likely to maintain more eye contact rather than less)

4. They make movements with their hands (upward gestures with the palms)

5. They touch themselves (touching the face or wringing one’s hands for example)

6.  They raise their voice

7. They make mistakes when speaking (liars often have more false speaking starts and mispronunciations than those who speak honestly)

How do you know when someone is lying to you? Do you call them on it?

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