wedding dated

When I was younger, I babysat for a couple who had their wedding photos hanging in the living room. The mother and I used to look at them -- her husband's powder blue tuxedo, her big hair and billowing shoulders, their multi-tiered plastic-filled wedding cake -- and laugh. "It was a long time ago," she said with a sigh. Indeed, I thought. It was.

Yesterday, I had the shocking realization that I am now her. My own wedding 11 years ago is just about that dated. Someone hold me.

The fact is, 11 years after a wedding, trends are bound to change. Intellectually, it's obvious. But honestly, had you told me then just HOW much would change, I might not have believed you.

It turns out, I got married in the Dark Ages.

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People love to say it's not about the wedding, it's about the marriage. And I agree, of course. But let's be honest: It's a LITTLE about the wedding, and weddings today are so different for these whippersnappers than they were back in my day. We put together 10 signs your once-hip wedding is now hopelessly dated. Do any of them sound familiar?

1.) You didn't have a celebrity or natural disaster or some other spectacular thing photobomb your wedding pictures. Have you seen this trend in wedding photography? It is so cool! Have a celebrity show up in your wedding pictures or announce your engagement. They should be running from some scary animal or otherwise engaged in ANYTHING besides boring, stiff posing and smiling. We are SO past that!

2.) You had a traditional wedding cake instead of three tiers of cupcakes. Or donuts. Or any manner of "funky" boutique dessert that seems a lot cooler than a plain, old, multi-tiered wedding cake. Guests love this too since they can pick and choose their flavor. Alas, my guests had to make do with vanilla and buttercream. I feel so guilty!

3.) You sent out an actual paper invitation rather than an Evite. Are people still doing paper invites? I know SOME are. OK, probably most. But I am also amazed by the number of professional wedding websites and electronic services available to brides today. In my day, we had ONE website and it looked almost like an Apple IIc looks to my children. Not pretty.

4.) You had a DJ or band, not an iPod doing your reception music. The new hot thing is to make your own playlist from your iPhone or iPad and boom! No extra money on the DJ. You can save that extra cash for the playlist every guest will receive on their way out the door sent straight to THEIR iPods. Wow. Technology. I had a band. Yep. I'm old. On the other hand, I'd still have a band today.

5.) Your wedding "video" is obsolete since you have no VCR. Oh yeah. This is me. My kids wanted to see our wedding, and when we pulled out the tape, they were all wide-eyed and shocked. "WHAT is that?" they asked. It's a tape, kids. In the Stone Age, we watched things on them. And they had to be rewound.

6.) There's a whole new style of engagement ring. You know EVERYONE always has the same engagement ring? Or at least it seems that way? In the days of yore (when I got hitched), it was the Tiffany setting, round cut. Now, it's the Halo. That basically didn't exist when I got engaged. I'm old, dude.

7.) Your flower girl is now getting married herself. Yep. So that happened. She was just a baby! Now she's having one. And you are sprouting gray hairs.

8.) Your wedding dress style is featured in those "olden times" photo booths at the county fair. Yep, it was in, then out. Then IN again. Once you see the second coming of your wedding style, you KNOW you are older than dirt.

9.) The food at your wedding was standard fare. Now there are toast bars, candy buffets, and mashed potatoes in a glass. Where was this stuff when I was getting married?!

10.) All your wedding photography was on the ground. There were no drone photos. Just you, your man, the band, your ancient paper invites, your olden time dress, and photographers who may have even used (GASP!) film. The horror!

Try not to cry too hard. The more dated your wedding, the more successful your union, right? More than a decade ago, I got married. My dress was of ye olden times, my band was positively medieval. And it was a blast. Love him still.

I just want another one now.

What about your wedding feels out of date now?


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