My Wife & I Have Dreams That Are Hurting Our Marriage

My wife slaves for 10 hours a day to pay our bills while I sit home, ignore the laundry, and share our life with strangers.

Putting her family's needs above her own sets a good example for our 3-year-old daughter. It demonstrates that sacrifice is noble. However, it also creates tension in the house.

My wife's dream was to produce TV. But cervical cancer at age 20 caused her to drop out of college and into a steady succession of legal clerical jobs to pay her medical bills.

Why should she be the one to give up everything?

Not counting high school jobs, I've never been anything but a journalist -- a skillset that, these days, makes me only slightly more marketable alive than dead.

Because my wife so unflinchingly supports my struggle to continue earning as a writer, I recently made a concession to her. I interviewed for a high-paying position I didn't want that would have forced me to give up this blog and all my other writing.

I didn't get the job. But the thing is, I don't know whether I really would have taken it if I did. You see, I'm setting an example for our daughter, too: If you are lucky enough to figure out what you really want to do in life, never give up on it.

The problem is, I'm not sure if that's a good example anymore.

How do you know when it's time to sacrifice your dream for your relationship and family?


Image by Corey Levitan

love, marriage