People Who Have Same-Sex Fantasies May Not Be Gay After All

Could a person think obsessively about members of the same sex and not be gay? Apparently so, according to a psychologist who specializes in Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Dr. Steven Brodsky says he often gets clients -- normally male -- who worry obsessively about whether or not they stared too long at that hot guy in the shower room (a real concern, apparently) are not necessarily gay. I guess I have to feel bad for guys -- women are totally allowed to check out other women all of the time, and we do it too. "Oh, that girl's ass is great. Does she do yoga?" "I totally want tits like hers." No one cares. We don't care. It's expected. But guys do that and they get all Am-I-gay?-phobic.

Dr. Brodsky says that people who have gay OCD (seriously!) have intrusive and anxiety-provoking thoughts about the same sex -- but that their real life activities don't point towards being gay. He tells ABC News:

If he is not actually attracted to people of the same sex, does not masturbate to fantasies of people of the same sex, is not really aroused by same sex pornography, then it is hard to make the case that he has a homosexual orientation.

He says one of these straight dudes who mistakenly think he's gay might spend all day online looking at gay porn sites, obsessively wondering if he's gay, but not deriving any pleasure out of it. He says:

They know they're not attracted to the same sex and are to the opposite sex, but are consumed all day long with this battle. They can think of nothing else. A gay person doesn't go through this battle.

A gay person doesn't go through this battle?! Really?!

I think plenty of gay people do battle their attractions -- also some other people are simply confused and probably mostly attracted to one sex but slightly attracted and intrigued by the other. But then maybe the good doc is right. Maybe there are some genuinely heterosexual people who are, for some reason, consumed with wondering whether he/she is gay.

I do have a friend who claims to have frequent sexual thoughts about the same sex -- but swears up and down he is straight. I've seen enough of this man's behavior to truly believe he is attracted to women. But I've always thought he was probably bi and wouldn't admit it.

But maybe he's gay OCD?

Have you heard of this? Do you buy it?


Image via laura dye/Flickr

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Rhodin Rhodin

The opposite has been true for years.  Gay men going so far as getting married to women to prove how straight they are.

Frost... FrostyMelted

OCD can take all forms so it's possible.

nonmember avatar Ella

What if you are a straight female but enjoy watching gay porn? Or like the idea of two guys at it? What does that make someone?

Carter Cortelyou

Having OCD that is usually mild, but very focused, I can absolutely accept this idea. In my mid-twenties, I can't tell you how many times I ALMOST reached for the phone because that obsession-fed neuron in my brain was convinced I was having a heart attack.

nonmember avatar BJ

Such quackery from Dr. Brodsky. It isn't OCD, but homophobia these men suffer from. Anyone who thinks they are gay to such a degree IS gay. The fact they are so uncomfortable with it makes them homophobic from years of conditioning by their environment telling them how horrible they are for being gay. Someone need to investigate this fool doctor for malpractice.

Zenezzy Zenezzy

No mention of some the straight men who are gay porn actors and have orgasms, but claim it is only part of thier job?

nonmember avatar Myfriend

This is absolutely true. My boyfriend (now my husband) had such severe OCD & was convinced something was terribly wrong with him because he knew he wasn't gay but yet his brain was torturing him. It was a problem for many months and he saw several therapists who helped him with this issue. He was (and still is!) attracted to me, never wants to be with a man, and yet he couldn't stop thinking he might be gay. It's no joke and it's was a really terrible time for us, but I stuck by his side and we're happily married.

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