A new app from Time.com says it can "predict your perfect marriage date." No, it doesn't need a crystal ball or Millionaire Matchmaker Patti Stanger to do so. Just your Facebook account, which it analyzes to determine "when your friends are tying the knot -- and when it might be time for you to take the plunge" ... providing the exact age (down to weeks and days) by which you "should" say "I do." Ugh.
No matter how bogus and irritating that sounds, obviously it's tempting to indulge our curiosity and see what the app says and how that compares to the reality of our love lives. Here, real women's results and what they thought about 'em ...
- "App said 30 for me, so [that's] in 17 days. Which is funny, because I'm expecting, and my parents are pushing super-hard for a wedding. But I married at age 24 and got divorced. I would say 30 is probably better, because I have a better understanding of what I want from my career, friends, family life, etc. However, I completely 100 percent do not regret my first marriage, and it was pretty awesome even when it wasn't. [My ex] even wrote me an email recently saying he had no regrets about our time together. We both grew a lot, found ourselves, and turns out we didn't fit together, and that was okay with us. My family -- mortified. But that's their problem." -Susan
- "Says I should be married in 9 months and 13 days. I'm getting married in 3 months and 5 days. So close, but no cigar!" -Katie
- "I'm 41, and [the app] told me I was supposed to get married 2 months and 2 days ago. I'm divorced. But I had just started talking to my now boyfriend two months ago. Maybe it's trying to tell me something." -Michele
- "I got 38.1 years old. Target date was 2 months and 2 days ago. However, I got married at 24 -- well before my 'target date,' and we're still going strong!" -Stephanie
- "Mine said 30.2. I was married at 20 though and separated at 28, divorced at 29. I have no desire to get married anytime soon if ever again. The older I get, the more I am learning that I am happier single." -CafeMom member Greenenvy
- "I got 33.8 years old. That leaves [me] 1 year, 6 months, and 18 days. ... I ACTUALLY got married when I was 17 and have been happily married since." -CafeMom member JNixon92599
- "Median age of my 33 married friends (way more than 33 of my FB friends are married, by the way) is 42.5 years old. My target date was 2 months & 13 days ago. ... I got married at 25. I've been separated (working on divorce, still) for 1.5 years and I've been in a relationship for 6 months. I guess it gives me hope for getting remarried? Not that I'm in a hurry to do that -- I'm still working on getting UNmarried. No rush there." -Marjorie
- "Mine is 28.2 years old. Target date was 4 months and 22 days ago. ... I was 22 when I got married, and DH was 20, so we definitely got married WAY before my target date says I was supposed to! I think that I wouldn't have minded getting married at the age I am now (28). I would have been more settled into a career and financial status if I had waited, but I don't regret when we got married. Half the fun of our marriage has been the journey of adulthood we've been going through together." -Leah
- "I got 33.8 years old. That leaves [me] 2 years, 1 month, and 28 days. ... Um, I got married at 18 ... I think I'll be OK!" -Jeanne
- "I got 36.5. ... I got married at 19 and divorced at 30, so I guess I had a whole other life before 'my time'!" -Jenny
- "My target age is 31.0, and I'm just over 30 now! That leaves me, according to their calculations, 4 months and 14 days to get married. I guess this answers my question about whether or not I should cancel my eHarmony membership." -Rebecca
- "My 'target age' is 43.1! I was 39 when I got married, so I beat it by four years. Woo hoo! Had I waited this long, it's doubtful I'd be able to have my two amazing kids!" -Catherine
- "My target range is 23.2 (WHAT?!), and my 23rd birthday is in just two weeks. Per Time's algorithm, I have about 100 days to find my true love, so line up, gentlemen! In the meantime, I’ll be purging my friends list." -Suzee
And as for me, the app told me my target age was 30.4, so my target date was 16 days ago. Well, whew, good thing I actually got hitched 9 months ago! Just in the knick of time! ... Can you tell how absolutely ludicrous I think this all is?
It also bears noting that the "methodology" Time.com used to calculate these so-called target dates is flawed, because a lot of people claimed more of their Facebook friends are married than the app found. That may be the result of the app only counting friends who list their date of birth, including the year, which amounts to just 25 percent of all profiles.
In other words, this app or anyone's judgment on a deadline for saying "I do" is complete bunk. And the idea that we should base when we get married on when our friends are getting married is totally twisted. Talk about the wrong reasons to sign up for wedded bliss! Just like the "right age" to have a baby, making a commitment to someone to be in a healthy lifetime partnership is something that needs to happen on an individual's own watch; no one else's!
What did the app tell you was your target date to get married? How do you feel about that?
Image via Thomas van de Weerd/Flickr