10 Things You NEVER Want to Hear When Your Guy Has Cheated

broken heartCheating sucks, period. Whether or not things were going swimmingly in the relationship or the two partners were headed for Splitsville -- hearing that a man, your man, has gone for someone else? Yeah, hello major punch in the stomach. Often times, being cheated on triggers such a wide array of emotions, many of which may make a crying woman want to hide behind a bedroom door ... forever.

And as hard as it is for the person in the relationship, it's also hard for her friends to try and figure out how to be around her. Let's face it: it's the female nature to try to say something, anything to comfort your friend after the hardship she's been through. That's why we need to go through the procedure. Here are 10 things never to say to someone who's been cheated on:

1. He was never right for you. Great. So you're telling her this now when you should have told her months before? I'm sure she would have valued your opinion when she was head over heels, too.

2. It happens to everyone. Actually, it doesn't. And saying this just makes her upset thinking about her other good friend who just posted her beautiful engagement photos on Facebook.

3. He was never nice to your friends. Oh, so now you're telling her that she should have something sooner.

4. Are you SURE you can't take him back? So you think the right thing to do is to set her up for more failure, eh? I mean, sure, there are one-offs and everyone has their own opinion about what it means if a woman goes back to a man who has cheated on her. But still, telling her to go back so soon after the trauma? Probably not the best idea.

5. You should get tested. Way to kick her when she's down. Exactly what she needs, to freak out some more right now.

6. What's she like? You honestly think your girlfriend wants to think about the other woman?!

7. Once a cheater, always a cheater. This makes your friend feels like it's her fault that the man cheated on her. Maybe she really thought this was different. And if that's the case, the last thing she needs to do is blame herself for his indiscretions.

8. Do you think it's something you did? STOP. MAKING. HER. OVERANALYZE. THINGS.

9. Have you guys have sex since you found out? If she says yes, she's weak. If she says no, she may think about how much she misses that intimacy and break down. Either way, it's a lose-lose.

10. How could you NOT have known? Were there any signs? Again with the blame game. Just so, so unnecessary.

How have you dealt with a cheating significant other in the past?

 

Image via freegrungetextures/Flickr

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Manth... Manthie717

I had two children with my husband when I found out he cheated on me. They were 3 1/2 yrs and almost 1 1/2 yrs old. I booted him to the curb even though I knew things would be tough with two small children. I made the best of the situation and moved on. Today my children are almost 28 and 26 yrs old and their father and I are civil to one another when we have to be involved in family activities that include everyone. We also have 3 grandchildren now.

nonmember avatar Mimi

So say nothing about the divorce just nod your head and offer your place?

nonmember avatar Paige Kaye

Yep. Say nothing unless asked. When someone goes through a difficult time in their life, be it a divorce, a cheating partner, a death, a failed pregnancy, a lost job, the best thing to do is remind them that you're there if they need you - for conversation or a shoulder to cry on - and they can call on you if they need you. I can think of no situation in life where tired, pointless platitudes are welcomed.

nonmember avatar sara

Been on both sides of this equation. The feelings are horrible. Be there when they find out, just listen the shock is horrible. Hold their hand, give them tissues and a shoulder to cry on. Only thing a person wants.

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