Men Are More Heartbroken When Relationships End Than Women

According to a new study from UK dating site Elite Singles, it turns out that men are actually the ones that have a harder time getting over a breakup than women. Kind of blows that crying-into-your-Ben-and-Jerry’s stereotype out of the water, huh?

After polling 501 singles, pollsters concluded that “25 percent more men than women admitted to suffering lovesickness after each relationship, with far fewer guys having to be ‘really in love’ to experience it.”

Well ok then. One psychologist suggested that it’s because men have a tendency to “overestimate a woman’s interest,” and may feel more rejection when she’s just not that into him. Maybe … but I have a different theory, especially if we’re talking about long-term relationships.

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This study only polled people on the heartbreak after the relationship ended. With more and more women doing the breaking up these days, it’s usually because she’s already been grieving as the relationship deteriorated. She’s likely been trying to fix it for a while, and by the time she gets to the end of her rope trying to find some common ground with her partner, she’s just done.

In those situations, when the guy couldn’t or wouldn’t take her seriously when she said things needed to change if the relationship was going to survive, of course he’s going to be heartbroken. Upset with her, upset with himself, and let’s face it -- men don’t typically take rejection very well anyway.  

So yeah, maybe guys are the ones that are more rattled after a relationship ends, but it doesn’t necessarily mean the girls were any less emotionally invested or heartbroken themselves.

Who do you think typically has a harder time after a breakup?


Image via javi.velazquez/Flickr

breakups, divorce


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David Weideman

I can speak for my brother. He was devastated when his wife confessed she was cheating on him.

Until she admitted this, I really thought my brother and his wife had figured out the marriage thing. They were a couple for a decade before they married and were married for over 10 years. They seemed really happy. Her admission she was seeing another man was out of the blue.

Since their divorce, he has been drinking a lot more, he took up smoking(but quit through e-cigs) and he is generally really depressed. It surprises me because my brother has always been the cheerful, outgoing, charming one in the family. The girls always loved him, but he was faithful to his wife. He has been dating a few women, but nothing seems to stick. He'd rather spend more time with his cats, which isn't like him.

I don't have any answers here, but if I'd been married, I would most likely be just as hurt as my brother. I just can't imagine cheaing on my wife.

Happy... Happydad73


Yes men have hearts, but according to this study women don't.

nonmember avatar Anonymous

When men commit, it's serious... and they get seriously hurt they're dumped. Women just see it as trading-up.

nonmember avatar Tina

Every single boyfriend that I broke up with took it super hard and were sort of in denial it seemed. One in particular kept showing up at my house and wait for me after class. He would make up excuses like " I think I dropped a $20 bill on your lawn" lol WTF! Even after a got a new boyfriend he would follow us. It was super creepy.

nonmember avatar nellbell

after ending my abusive marriage my ex has taken it harder than me he never thought i would leave not to mention he has lost control etc. i feel im handling it very well as i emtionally checked out of the relationship a long time and now am getting stronger and happier each day

youth... youthfulsoul

I feel along the same lines as the author.  You can only try for so long as a woman before you just give up and by then you just don't care anymore. Speaking from personal experience.

Heavy... Heavy_Pipe

It makes sense from an evolutionary standpoint. Men are constantly dying in wars throughout history tho much less so in the past few hundred years while the women would become war prizes, war brides, etc. and adapted emotionally over time.

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nonmember avatar Jen

I have usually been the bigger giver in relationships. And more devastated when it ends.

Maybe I just dated a lot of jerks. But it seems like men don't really care. They're "onto the next one."

Organ... Organizedchaos8

I agree with the author because it happened with my last relationship. I spent a lot of time trying to fix it and by the time I ended it I was more relieved than sad. It's not because I was heartless, it's because by that time the relationship had been over for a while and I'd already gone through the emotions associated with a break up.

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