Do Men Hit on You More When You Look Like a Hot Mess?

dressing downOne of the things that women learn pretty quickly in the world of dating is that the female standard of beauty and the male one are often greatly at odds. Women prefer Jennifer Aniston -- cute, perky, perfectly dressed, perfectly manicured -- while men would rather Angelina Jolie -- sexy, a little messy, natural, often undone.

The reality is, I have often found the less I do to myself, the more my husband enjoys it. "Did you put lipstick on?" he will ask me, giving me a disapproving look. But when I am completely natural, not made up, and hair unbrushed, he's all: "HELLO."

I'm not alone, either. Women talk about the time about how they get hit on more when they are a "hot mess" than when they get all done up. And it makes perfect sense.

There is something vaguely untouchable about a woman who is perfectly done. Plus, as my husband always points out, it's fake.

Men prefer someone real, someone down to Earth. Most of the time, anyway. A woman who is approachable is much more appealing than someone who looks like a perfectionist or like one makeup nick will ruin her whole day.

There is also something to be said for comfort. A woman who is comfortable in her skin is sexy. She may be in sweats or PJs, but her body is still visible and she feels good. There is no constrictive fabric or heels digging into her skin. She can move freely and be herself.

That's sex appeal, baby.

So the next time you feel bad about yourself and think you look a hot mess, look around. Your Lululemon yoga pants may FEEL unsexy as hell, but you would be surprised how many people are checking out the rear view while you saunter by.

Meanwhile, I am never getting dressed up again. This is the perfect excuse.

Do you think men hit on you more when you are messy?


Image via lululemon athletica/Flickr



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nonmember avatar Karri

I never wear make-up and usually my hair is kind of a mess too. But guys usually hit on me more when I'm dressed up.

Lindsay Renee Edwards

men hit on me more when i FEEL good. whether i'm in dresses and heels, or yoga pants and a tshirt. 
if i am feeling good, i get hit on.

i think a lot of women who get all "done up" on a regular basis, do it because they are insecure with themselves. i personally do it for that extra oomph.  and i ALWAYS get hit on when i am done up. because i feel good.
its not about the clothes, its about the comfort. and i dont buy the "untouchable" lady thing one bit. men LOVE to mess up a woman ;-) 

nonmember avatar BostonBob

I much prefer jeans and t-shirt on a woman than "Done Up".

Too many women give off the vibe that they spent too much time on their appearance to allow themselves to be "Messed Up".

"Wow. Jeez. You have a LOT of make up on." Doesn't do it for me that much.

BGarcel BGarcel

I feel similar to Lindsay. When I'm confident with myself, I get hit on more. However, most women get all "done up" for that extra oomph as well, not because of image insecurities.

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