Any wife who says she never tries to look good for her husband is probably lying. The reality is, no matter how long you have been married, you still want your husband to fancy you and find you irresistible. But what about OTHER men finding you hot?
A British writer (in the Daily Mail, of course) says that IS the key to a spicy marriage. In an article titled, "Why It's Every Woman's Job to Make Other Men Fancy Her," writer Angela Epstein explains that it really is a wife's duty to make sure she is pulling attention from other men to bring out her man's "inner neanderthal."
I kind of get what she is trying to say. Kind of. The reality is, the kind of attractive that appeals to women and the kind that appeals to men are often two very different things.
Women might like the clothing another woman is wearing or they might think her hair is a hot style. But men look at other things. Does she look inviting? Does she have clear skin and nice eyes? What is her body like?
They also often like a heavier woman than other women like. I agree that dressing for men should be the plan. But whether or not other men are attracted to me is kind of beside the point. I am only dressing for one man.
Is that sexist? Maybe. But it's also just part of marriage. Just like I expect my husband to at least look somewhat hot, I know he wants me to do the same. He knows I like a scruffy beard and so he keeps one. He knows I like his body and so he keeps it up.
I do the same. But it isn't for other men. Maybe back in my 20s before I had children, I dressed hot and loved male attention, but at 35, that ship has kind of sailed. I would be pretty pathetic if I were hanging out a bar in hot clothing, hoping some man would look my way at this point in my life.
For many men, "sexy" doesn't mean revealing clothing or trying to recapture some youthful thing that no longer suits. It's more a state of mind, something between the two of you. Sure, it makes my husband happy when other men find me attractive, but whether they do or they don't is irrelevant. HE finds me attractive.
I know this because he paws at me all the time. I don't keep up my appearance just for him, either. I do it for myself. It's for us. When I feel hot, I feel more frisky and more apt to believe him when he tells me I am beautiful.
To a man, THAT is irresistible.
Do you dress so other men find you sexy?
Image via Public Domain Photos/Flickr