How to Get Your Guy to Do the One Thing in Bed You Love the Most


man's mouthHow important is oral sex to you?

Let's say that you love your man. And he loves you. The two of you have this really, really wonderful relationship. Except for this one thing: He doesn’t go down on you. You know what I mean. He's not a beaver whisperer or a believer in the art of cunnilingus.  

For some women, this might be okay. But for me, it would be a deal breaker. I think performing oral sex on each other is one of the greatest pleasures of intimacy. And happily, my husband and I are on the same page on this.

But if your guy is hesitant and you're looking to be on the receiving end, here are some things that you can do to help him find his way.

Give and you shall receive: Relationships shouldn’t be tit for tat but sometimes, they just are. It’s human nature. So give him the kind of pleasure that you want him to give you.

Dress it up: Put on a pair of sexy underwear. Make them lacy, crotchless -- or even just throw on an accentuating pair of boy shorts. I've learned to leave my granny panties in the drawer when I'm looking for a little oral.

Get a haircut: I'm a fan of the semi-Brazilian, but I understand that not everyone believes in a good waxing. Even so, a nice trim goes a long way. You could even try a sparkly vajazzling. I personally haven’t been bejeweled but I would do it for a special occasion.

Clean it up: Taking a shower together might alleviate an inexperienced man's fear of the unknown. Let him make you fresh and clean. Think of it as foreplay.

Be a guide: When you finally get him down there, let him know what moves make you feel good. You can even use your hands to gently point him in the right direction.

Most importantly, speak up. Men don’t always know what we want, especially when it comes to our bodies. We need to tell them. Talking about what turns you on will make you and your partner closer. And that has benefits beyond the bedroom.

Is no oral sex a deal breaker for you?

Image via fabrisalvetti/Flickr

sex, turn-ons, sexuality


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LadyM... LadyMinni

"Honey, will you eat me out? You know how much I love it, you're amazing." Proposing 69 works really well too.

nonmember avatar Ugh

My husband only tries when he knows ill refuse. Yet he always says he loves it. He never does when he knows ill let him (right after a shower...) he always seems to enjoy it when he finally does. Once a year. Obviously not a deal breaker for me but it can be disappointing.

Serab... Serabelle

Omg, no oral would so be a deal breaker for me! I have never been able to get off without it!

xreds... xredstarsx

I've gotten it like 5 times in the past 5 years. He's not good at it so him not doing it doesn't bother me much. If he were good at it though his refusing would drive me nuts.

femal... femaleMIKE

When I was more comfy in my own skin, I would flash him my baldness and that would get him going.

Erika NW Goodall

My husband turned me off of it completely. He would start gagging and saying he was going to throw up, and it made me feel repulsed by my own nether region. Even when I just get out of the shower and I'm clean and fresh it still grosses him out.

nonmember avatar NoWay

Erika .. I hope you don't give him head, and if you do, give him the same "courtesy" of gagging and saying you are going to vomit ... (my ex used to do the same thing, but my current husband can't get enough of me so I know it's not me...)

nonmember avatar Sara

My ex-husband never went down on me. He always said he couldn't breath because of his allergies. What, was he allergic to my vagina?

My current boyfriend doesn't think he's very good at oral sex, but I enjoy it and we've had some fun with 69 before, too.

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