10 Lame Excuses People Use to Stay in Bad Relationships

When you're in a bad relationship and feel like it's time to get out, you usually know it. Deep, deep down, you know it. You lie awake at night, wondering what it will take to make you get out. But then you come up with a bunch of excuses. And they're usually pretty lame ones. I'm not talking about the BIG reasons, like you have a child together or can't afford to live on your own with your kid. I'm talking those lamo excuses that you can keep going for years ... but that when you finally get out, you'll look back and can't even remember what silly reasons you came up with for staying so long.

Here's 10 lame excuses people use to stay in bad relationships.

Holidays. Holidays are always a great (read: lame) excuse to stay in a bad relationship. But it's almost New Year's Eve. I can't be alone on New Year's Eve! But it's almost my birthday. I want that new coat he promised me! But there's hardly a month that goes by without some sort of holiday. I've seen people use this particular excuse for years.

Your single friends. All of them complain about being single so relentlessly that you figure it's probably better to be in a bad relationship than to be single and complaining about guys you hardly know.

Your coupled friends. They, too, complain about their relationships. Hey, if everyone is complaining, then being in a bad relationship is normal, right? Wrong.

Your pet. While a child might be a genuine sticking point to breaking up, I've also seen people drag on a bad relationship for years because neither could bear the thought of who would get the dog. C'mon, people, you can share custody of a dog pretty easily.

Sex. The rest of the relationship may be hell, but the sex is still pretty good, so you stick around for that.

The rent. So many people stay together so they can continue to split the rent and utilities. This is probably a somewhat better excuse than most, but I still say that a bad relationship can drain you to the point where your psyche is seriously going to suffer not only now but long into the future. Better to look into roommates.

Not a good time. Whether it's a holiday or birthday or you just got laid off or his parents are sick or yours are or whatever else is going on, it's just not a good time. In reality, life is always going be throwing something at you. Rare is the time when absolutely everything is going your way. There's never a good time for a break-up.

He's too nice. You know it's all wrong and you don't want to have a future with this person, but since he hasn't done anything awful you feel like you don't have the "right" to break up with him. If you're not feeling it, and it's not just because you have unrealistic expectations, then you have the right to break up with someone, even if he's "nice." If you don't, you're liable to start an affair just so you can get out. Better to go with some dignity.

There's probably no one better out there. Maybe not. That's not the point. The point is that you're miserable. Better to be alone and content than coupled up and unhappy.

You don't like confrontation. Oh, boy, this one could go on for eons. Get some cojones. It's not fair to the other person to stay in a relationship you don't want just because you don't want to make anyone upset. You'll make the person upset eventually because you'll do something to sabotage the relationship and hope your partner decides to leave. Why not do it while you can still look your significant other in the eye and be kind but honest? He or she deserves that.

Have you ever used a lame excuse that kept you in a relationship?

 

Image via Unlisted Sightings/Flickr

 

breakups, commitment

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Serab... Serabelle

I can't stand people like that. I have a friend that has been in a shitty situation for almost a year now, she's constantly composing that she thinks he's cheating. They've broken up twice, keep getting back together. He even came onto me, and she still won't dump him! Instead, now she isn't talking to me. I'd rather be alone forever with my dignity and self respect than be in her position. All because she "loves" him. Sorry, but love doesn't treat you that way!

Vegeta Vegeta

Lol the majority of these reasons are selfish (your only staying together so they can buy you stuff, give you sex, show up your friends, and pay your rent? Sounds like your using them) or lazy. If you don't want to better yourself then dont, but only you can change your situation. You dont need to break up in a mean way, my ex of 2 years and I discussed it and agreed it was good while it lasted but just wasn't gonna work out, and were still friends. Date logical and sensible people.

Pinkmani Pinkmani

Another lame excuse: kids! I know that many of you are saying, "How dare she say such a thing?" Having a healthy marriage shows your kids that they can have a healthy relationship, too.


If they see daddy insulting mommy, they are going to think it's normal. (The sons will insult their women, and the daughters will accept that). 


 

Rando... Randomlady

I've been using a lame (but true) excuse for a while, if I dump him then him and his autistic son will be homeless. I want to be selfish but I can't really do it knowing I've thrown 2 people on the streets, and he keeps guilt tripping me back...6 times so far. Instead I just picked up an extra job so I won't be home but for shower and sleep.

Ashley Crouse

None of those really applied to me. Mine was I didn't want to move back home so I put up with the nonsenes so I didn't have to go back to a place where I wanted nothing more than for two people to die and be done with it. Also, I don't see kids as a good excuse to 1. get married or 2. stay together. I would never stay in a horrible relationship because I had a kid with that person. I would simply explain to my child why I wasn't with their father and be done with it. No sense being miserable because you think you are helping your kid, when in reality you aren't. You're only showing them that putting up with that crap is acceptable.

nonmember avatar jenny

These are so true. Been having little doubts which have now grown into big ones about my bf of 4 years but knowing it is going to cause upset and a whole load of disruption even though he hasn't actually done anything wrong makes it very very hard.

nonmember avatar kristin

I stayed because he has never cheated on me, he really loved and needed me and i was too busy with school to figure out if i wanted to break up. Later on i found out he was cheating (messaging many girls to hookup and sending pictures) and i was in a abusive relationship. So that was a really lame excuse.

Mary-Ann Bok

what about we have two kids ?

nonmember avatar Luke

In my case, I don't think anyone else would date me. Actually, I'm pretty sure. So I continue to stay in a relationship with a girl that ignores me and never gives me sex. Yeah ....

nonmember avatar Jazmine

any feedback would be great! I have been talking to a fellow classmate through my Virtual Graduate school. He lives 3,000 miles away. We have talked for over a year now. When we first started talking he said he had a girlfriend of convenience, when I asked if he had a girlfriend. He just surprised me and got into class with me, and we have been planning a future meeting. Just found out him and that girlfriend were together for 5 years, and things dwindled/fizzled. He doesnt like to talk about X's and I'm not 100 percent sure she is not in the picture. We are skyping in about a week, and I want to make sure he ended this with his girlfriend, but I'm not sure it's my place to do that yet, even though things have started getting intimate in nature.

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