Maybe it's because we've been married for eight years, or because my husband is a little odd, but I think his turn-ons are pretty ... different.
Now considering I get hot watching him do the dishes and fold the laundry, I can see where the regular old sexy underpants foreplay might not do it for him anymore.
So hey, if you're having trouble getting your husband in the mood, maybe these five off-the-wall ideas will work for you.
1. Taking a shower
Now before you get all, "Well duh, you're naked!" let me just tell you that it's not that he's in the bathroom when I'm taking the shower. It's after the fact when he smells my hair and realizes that I'm clean that he starts to get turned on.
2. Leaving scissors in the shower
So the other day, one of my kids must have brought scissors into the shower (don't ask) and he came up to me and was like, "I saw you left scissors in the shower" -- which apparently means nether-region grooming to him. You should have seen his face when I told him that it wasn't me.
More from The Stir: 5 Things Wives Do to Turn Off Their Husbands
3. Cleaning anything
My husband is a bit of a neat freak, so the act of cleaning anything, particularly vacuuming carpets or clearing out the car, is like turning on the sex light for him. But since I'm fairly neat myself, I've found that it's usually chores I don't often do that get the most attention. Mowing the lawn would probably incite a riot.
4. Shaving my legs
I suppose this is a bit like the scissors in the shower, but if my legs are shaved, that's somehow interpreted as I want to get it on. This might seem a little more obvious in the winter where my legs don't need to see the light of day and therefore don't need to be shaved. But in the summer, he's often disappointed because, well, I'm wearing shorts and skirts so shaving is a daily routine for me.
5. Watching reality TV
To be clear, my husband doesn't watch reality shows, but I do. Or I used to, anyway. So apparently he thought that because it was so bad, I could be easily swayed into having sex with him. The funny thing: He was actually right. Too bad it doesn't work on him. Damn Border Wars.
What weird things turn your partner/spouse on?
Image via Spring Dew/Flickr