15 Signs Your Man Is Watching Too Much Smut & Filth

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Have you heard this? Some guys are actually wondering whether watching pornography has "warped" their minds. I mean, if men are wondering this, there's probably something to it. Watching too much porn can impact a man's ability to climax, can set up unrealistic standards, can make it difficult or impossible for men to get aroused by their partner -- in short, can ruin sex, basically. At least, real sex. You know, with someone else.

Part of the problem is the ubiquity of porn these days. Hell, you don't even have to pay for it anymore. You don't have to leave your den or even make sure your kids are in bed. You can watch it at work, on your phone, whatever and wherever. What chance does a real woman have if men are so hopped up on the ridiculous images they see in porn?

Here are 15 signs your man is watching too much porn.

1. He thinks you should start screaming a climax the second he touches you. Anywhere.

2. He thinks your climaxes should be SCREAMING. When you don't SCREAM, he accuses you of not liking sex.

3. He thinks if you can't climax during penetration, there's something wrong with you. Seriously suggests you see a doctor or get therapy.

4. He doesn't understand why your boobs don't jiggle and bounce up and down when you have sex. Keeps staring at them as if something is wrong with them.

5. He is confused as to why your boobs are less than a 40DD. Asks if you've been in a disfiguring accident.

6. He is shocked that you have HAIR down there. Tries to kill the "spider" on your vajay.

7. He is appalled if you fart, go number two, or have any kind of bodily function whatsoever. Thinks you must have eaten something bad. Wants to take you to the hospital.

8. When you ask him about condoms, he looks bewildered.

9. He goes for your butt with no questions asked. Is stunned when you turn him down. Accuses you of not being "open-minded."

10. Has absolutely no idea what is going on when you say, "Not tonight." Brain does not compute.

11. Thinks you'll totally be down for a threesome with him and your best friend. Or any random chick, really.

12. Totally thinks you can give three men a blowjob at the same time. Every woman has done that, right?

13. Doesn't understand what's happening when you show up in bed without makeup and in sweatpants.

14. Thinks you should be able to orgasm 10 times in a row though he's hardly doing anything to you. Accuses you of being frigid if you can't.

15. Says things like, "Yeah, you like it, don't you, you dirty little wh*re, you nasty little b*tch?"

Have you ever been with a guy who watches too much porn?

 

Image via Kainr/Flickr

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nonmember avatar Jelly Bean

Lol this list was funny!

Jenniy Jenniy

2, 3, 9 and 15 sound like my ex.

nonmember avatar Sqeaker

lol if my man pulled no.15 he'd have a red-a** handprint across his face for a week!

adrin... adriness666

Haha you forgot the whole finishing on your face while you're suppose to look eager while waiting.

Sandy Reis

true about the hair, anal and availibility. men now also want different girls each time. and very hardcore sex which they now think is normal

Ninja... Ninja_Kitty666

... Number 15 could also just be a sign that he's into the kinky stuff. My husband and I are into the S&M stuff and frequently say shockingly nasty things to each other in the bedroom that we'd NEVER say in normal activity. So... Yeah, that's not always a sign that he's just watching too much smut. =p

Blues... Blueshark77

Lol, Adeiness666, I was thinking about that one too! 


Anal sex seems to be a polite way of greeting someone in pornos, instead of a hug or handshake. They're so casual about it. I do worry about how teenage guys and girls will grow up thinking the things on this list are supposed to be the typical way of sex.

nonmember avatar Gina

Didn't even bother to read the article. I'm offended you refer to pornography as smut and filth like someone is a dirty foul, perverted individual for using a visual aid to achieve climax. Thanks a lot.

rhps2000 rhps2000

Here's one you don't have on there ... He's so quiet it's like effing the dead. My ex lived with his parents at 26 and was so used to porn and jerking off quietly that's how he did it. Oh! And porno tongue! He could not kiss me without ramming his tongue into my mouth with his gaping wide open. It was hideous and no amount of trying to teach him helped. Glaf he's my EX! :)

doodledo doodledo

So ...any man that did any of these things would not be getting any from me.

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