In a marriage, it's never OK to lie, right? We are supposed to be honest ALL the time. But let’s face it, there are some things we don’t want to tell him. And that’s OK. There are many things he's just better off not knowing.
For instance, has he ever asked you if something makes him look fat? If yes, then trust me, even if the answer IS yes, it's NEVER yes. Never. Always no. Repeat after me.
What about the times he wants sex and you just don’t? Do you ever say how tired you are or that you feel a little sick or that you had a long day even when none of it is true? If so, then you have lied. Admit it. We all do. Here are five lies it’s OK to tell your man once in a while:
1.) No, honey, he wasn't that cute: Picture this. You just left Les Miserables starring the adorable (handsome, sexy, large, strong) Hugh Jackman and your man is feeling a little insecure. If this were you, would you REALLY want him telling you that Amanda Seyfried is so beautiful, especially when you are rocking the top knot and J.Crew Saturday pants? I think not. He would lie to you. You should do the same.
2.) I have a headache: It’s a cliché for a reason. There are some nights sex just sounds really unappealing. But he doesn't need to hear that. All he needs to know is that he’s not getting laid for a good reason. So give him one. Even if it’s a lie.
3.) You look great: Men get insecure, too. They want to know how their shoes look with those jeans or if their button-down is too tight. Sometimes it's good to be honest. But sometimes they just want to hear they look good. Even if they don’t.
4.) I didn't notice you put on any weight at all!: Yes. We did. But there is a time and place for honesty, and when he is feeling low or bad about himself is NOT that time.
5.) It was on sale: While generally I am not one to condone lying about money and, in general, you shouldn't, men do get all bent out of shape about things they don’t get. Like, yes, some women pay $200 jeans. This shouldn't be that shocking. But for some men it is. If you tell them things are on sale, sometimes they relax. Sometimes they don’t. But, you know, that’s a discussion for another time.
Do you ever lie to your spouse?
Image via Sarah G.../Flickr
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Comments 39
We've been together for seven years and I have never lied to him. Not even a white lie. A) I know I'd never "get away with it" because he knows me too well and B) I just don't see the need. If I'm not in the mood but he is (and it's very rare that we aren't in sync), I tell him that and he respects it. But, more often than not, knowing that he is, instantly puts me in the mood. He just brought up the weight thing the other day and I was honest with him. Pointed out that he's getting older and his job is not physical anymore. I also pointed out that he was still insanely attractive.
I'm not judging those who do lie, just saying that I seem to be incapable of it (to him at least).
My guy beats himself up enough over his appearance and not being in perfect shape. I'm sure as hell not going to contribute to it. I do encourage him to work out, but also praise him about how strong he is (strongest guy I know) and how sexy I find it. It makes him feel good, just like it makes me feel good when he compliments me. We both know our flaws, and it doesn't help to point them out to each other.
I've lied to my man but it always comes out. Like one time I just got so frustrated with our dog and the neighbors harrassing me about it when it was there fault, I just took the dog to a shelter. I felt so guilty about the impulse response to get rid of him that I didn't tell my man for weeks what actually happened to him. As for white lies, we are just so blunt with each other and we love that.
I'm a woman, & hell I find it shocking that there are women who spend $200 on a pair of jeans! They are going to be just like a $20 pair, will wear out just the same, so WTH?! Never in my life would I spend that much one ONE PAIR of jeans.
I haven't bought an expensive pair of jeans in awhile, but they are much different than a $20 pair. They may not be worth $200 but they generally last longer and will flatter your body better than a $20 pair.
200 ON PANTS?! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! *I* would have a heart attack over it, Ben would just laugh WITH me...if you're spending 200 on jeans in this economy, stop lying and just get a divorce, you obviously don't give a shit about your money situation. Seriously, if you can't stop yourself from something like THAT and have to lie about it, just give up now, you're not doing it right. And don't feed me that line about "I just wanted to feel like I had money for once, I'm sick of being broke!" it's bullshit. If you feel like you're poor, you're probably poor and therefore don't have money for 200 dollar jeans, how ridiculous! everything else, they tell us the same thing, at least give them that much.