5 Things Wives Do to Turn Off Their Husbands

LOL 30

We all know there are plenty of ways for women to turn guys on. Heck, all they really need to do is look at a guy or talk to one. Or be in the same room.

Yes, guys like sex. They love it. They think about it 25 hours a day. And despite all our wives' excuses (the headaches, the time of the months, the I'm-just-too-tireds), we'd still go right on knockin' boots.

There are, however, certain things to stop us dead in our tracks. Deflate our balloons, so to speak. What exactly is our libido's kryptonite? Glad you asked! Here's a look at 5 things wives do to really turn off their husbands.

Shaving Is the Pits - Guys know women shave or wax their legs. But some are clueless that women actually grow hair in ... gasp ... other places, like under their armpits. So in that vein, watching your wife shave her armpits isn't the sexiest thing in the world. Granted, seeing your wife never shave her armpits is quite a bit worse.

The Golden Rule - While we're on the subject, why is it that when guys are in the bathroom shaving, that's always the exact moment their wives come barging in, announce they have to pee, and then do exactly that? Of course if you're into that sort of thing, it's a whole different ballgame ...

The Never-Ending Story - Yes, women naturally like to talk a lot more than men. And husbands should definitely listen to their wives' stories. But do they have to be soooo long? And full of soooo many tangential details? Trust me, I really don't need to know the exact brand and model number of the brush your best friend's hairdresser recommended for the dog.

Quiet on the Set - Speaking of talking ... don't. At least not while we're watching a movie. No, I don't know who that guy is. I'm not sure why he killed his brother. I don't know where the treasure is. I don't know what they said because you were talking, so I missed what they were saying. And now I missed what that woman was saying because I was explaining to you why I missed the previous conversation. For the love of Spielberg, please hold all questions until the final credits roll.

Installing a Dutch Oven - You know how women squeak one out under the covers hoping we guys won't notice? Sorry, honey, but the second we pull back those covers, our noses are going to win out over our other little friend. Granted guys can be just as big a buzzkill, except we all know women have a much higher tolerance for pain.

How does your husband turn you off?

Image via Jean KOULEV/Flickr

turn-offs, marriage


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

psych... psychofab

I do not pee in front of my husband. I don't even like it if he pees with the door open. That's just a private bodily function for me.

fleur... fleurdelys3110

Oh my goodness I do number 4 all the time! It drives my boyfriend crazy

the4m... the4mutts

Men turn me off by thinking that typical woman behavior is a turn off. If you don't like women, then just go be gay.

imamo... imamombygrace

If he spoke like you...that would be a turn off. My dh is in the medical field and it's impossible to gross him out or *gasp* not realize women grow body hair and have bodily functions. So glad my husband has taste, tact, and a level of maturity.

msiever msiever

Nothing my husband does turns me off because I love him. He's not an object to me. He is my best friend, my companion, my lover and my inspiration and support. 

nonmember avatar NoWay

LOL ... my husband does all of these more than I do. Well, except for the first one ... he doesn't shave hit pits. :) I love him, though! :)

nonmember avatar sherry

Oh boy, this isn't even in my hubbys top 10. There's about a billion things I do that turn him off more than these. Like pointing out he is wrong? We could go from there.

kjbug... kjbugsmom1517

These were so tame lol and are far from turn offs around here.....

Angie... AngieHayes

I bet your a turn off to your wife.

tuffy... tuffymama

What a sexist slab of shit you are, Andrew. Really? We fucking talk too much? And give my husband some credit. The man has shaved my legs, pits and pubes for me on more than one occasion. It's okay for men to fart on women? Little Woman can't utter a peep when the telly is on? I bet you're such a peach to your absolutely-better half. Poor dear must be chained simultaneously to the stove and the bedpost. Screw off, you subhuman, undeveloped jerk.

1-10 of 30 comments 123 Last