8 Promises Every Man Should Make to His Wife in the New Year

Hot List 16

toiletA new year beckons and, for many of us, that can mean a time of rebirth. A time to start anew. A time ... well, to make up for the ridiculously stupid things we did to our wives this year.

Yes, New Year's Day means New Year's Resolutions. While many take this opportunity to quit smoking or losing weight, many husbands can look to 2013 as a clean slate. A chance to wipe things out. Balance the checkbook, if you will.

Sure, we can all slip right back into the same slackers of years gone by and enjoy the comforts of a bumpy couch yet again. Or we can finally man up and make some New Year's Resolutions worth sticking to! With that in mind, I put together a list of 8 Promises to Make to Your Wife in 2013! These are my personal ones, but they most likely hold true for the majority of hubbies out there, so just adapt as needed.

To my beautiful, skinny, sexy, and intelligent wife:

1) Bottoms Up! - You probably never even noticed, but I promise to put the toilet seat down when I'm finished draining the pickle.

2) Under Where? - I promise not to leave my underwear laying on the floor every day. Just don't look under the bed, okay?

3) Let's Dish - Apparently the dishwasher doesn't fill itself. Futuristic society, my ass! Anyway, I promise to not leave my dishes on the table, but to put them in the dishwasher. (Most likely in the wrong spot so after two or three times you'll tell me to just forget it.)

4) Yo Momma - I promise to agree with you whenever you start talking trash about my mom. Or at least to keep my mouth shut. Or to only disagree slightly.

5) Blue Balls - Not only do I promise to perform lots more foreplay (which is the same as promising to perform foreplay), but I won't even let you reciprocate.

6) Food for Thought - I promise to make dinner for my beautiful wife at least once a month. Or at least once.

7) No Holes Barred - I'm sure it never bothered you, but all those holes in the wall? Yeah, I promise to spackle and paint them all this year. No, this time I'm serious.

8) Talk the Talk - For five minutes a day, I promise to ask you how your day was and really sit and listen. Don't be offended if I ask you while you're sleeping.

What promise would you like your husband to make for 2013?

Photo via Daniel Oines/Flickr

love, marriage


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

hello... hellokd87

As cute as the article is, not a single one of those applied to my fiancee as he already does all of them! LOL, I do wish he would promise to be more upbeat and optimistic about our finances. We're not struggling as bad as he exaggerates, however we don't get to "splurge" as often as we used to. I just want him to promise to not be so much of a Negative Nancy half the time.

we2an... we2angels

I promise to sit beside you and not grope you

JessL... JessLogansMommy

Hellokd87, he does them because he's still your fiancee! 

dixie... dixiechick2

Promise not to fart at the table AND not act like a child!

Pinkmani Pinkmani

The man of the house already does these plus breakfast in bed on a daily basis.

SP_Mama SP_Mama

My husband already does all that. I'm a lucky girl. We have even taught our boys to close the lofty after using it. I figure some woman will appreciate that some day. *L*

caral... caralicious

how about learn to refill the toilet paper dispenser?

bme.c... bme.click87

I promise to be more understanding

the4m... the4mutts

How about Andrew should promise to never again refer to his penis as a PICKLE ever again? Worst mental image EVER.

katie... katiew2012


Nope, not needed. I have no qualms about putting the seat down myself. We don't put them back up for them, so why should we expect them to put them down?

and the rest... well, lame. My husband helps around the house, does laundry and dishes without me needing to ask. He figures he lives here too, he might as well help.

The promise I'd want to see? Him to be less self-deprecating.

1-10 of 16 comments 12 Last