Call me old fashioned, but I think it's a bad sign if the groom-to-be wants a bigger wedding than you do. Especially if he wants to wear the wedding gown. Har har. No, really. That's almost what it's like, for crikey's sake. A groom wanting a big wedding to-do and a bride not wanting it?! In what world does that happen except maybe in some weird reality show Oxygen has yet to invent?
But a recent study shows that men now apparently are twice as likely to want a big, expensive wedding as women. And if that's the case, carefully rethink your plans to wed this Groomzilla, lest you spend a lifetime trying to pay off your man's expensive whims.
First off, a wedding is traditionally the bride's day. Seriously, fellas, it wasn't called Kris Humphries' Fairytale Wedding. I'm not saying it's not the groom's day too -- but, face facts, no one will be looking at the groom. If a woman is forced into the whole buying an expensive gown thing, and rounding up a bunch of bridesmaids thing, and walking down the aisle thing when she doesn't WANT it, that's just wrong. Something off with a guy that would force that kind of unwanted attention and stress on his betrothed.
The study suggests that in this "new" (read: crappy) economy, women are just being more practical than men, hence their lack of desire to spend a bunch of money no one has on a wedding. So unless the guy has tons of his OWN money to burn -- and that includes paying for your gown and bridesmaids dresses -- then get ready for a lifetime of going into debt for his whims.
Also, this just screams narcissistic personality disorder. I can't think of many reasons why a dude would want a big wedding that his gal doesn't want -- but high on the list is probably impressing his friends, colleagues, boss, and family. A wedding shouldn't be about impressing anyone but the person you're about to marry. And that doesn't mean demanding a big wedding that she doesn't want or can't afford or feels neither one of you can afford.
Does this go both ways? Sure. I know of a guy who broke off his engagement two weeks before his wedding because his fiancée began spending outrageously, hurling them far into debt before they'd even tied the knot. (Last I knew, he was still paying off the non-wedding.) But there's just something about a guy who wants a big wedding more than a woman that's all kinds of red flaggy. I'm not saying he's gay, but you might just want to go ahead and check his underwear drawer for stray Playgirl magazines.
Do you think a man who wants a big wedding when the woman doesn't is off his rocker?
Image via SpaceOdissey/Flickr


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Comments 7
It would be impossible for my boyfriend to want a bigger wedding than I do. He's so low key whereas I love grandeur and to be the center of attention. Although we aren't getting married in the near future, I can picture the scneario of me wanting opulence and glamor and my boyfriend kind of just not caring about the details and going along for the ride.
He's not off his rocker - he's gay.
LOL to Venae! That's funny (yet somehow may have some validity). My fiancee doesn't necessarily want a big wedding, but he has been a little bit of a bridezilla when it comes to planning. I feel that if something doesn't go right, big deal, as long as we're both standing side by side at the altar that's all that matters to me. But he's more of a worrier that he wants to make sure EVERYTHING is perfect and how I want it. But then again the way he sees it is it's our one and only wedding of our lives, so might as well make sure it's 110% perfect. :-D
@Izzie Agreed! While I agree that if his decision or want for a grandeur wedding doesn't take into account finances then it's something to consider as a red flag, but if he/you can afford it and it's something that would make him happy, why is it 'weird'? Compromise should be key in everything, and in the same why a woman should steamroll a man with wedding decisions, it shouldn't happen in reverse either.