12 Reasons We Blame ‘the Other Woman’ Instead of the Unfaithful Man

Rant 20

Recently I wrote about married country crooner Jason Aldean being caught kissing former American Idol contestant Brittany Kerr and all of the hate Brittany got online. People called her "slut" and "homewrecker" and compared her to LeAnn Rimes. Speaking of LeAnn Rimes, notice how much hate she got compared to the married guy she was cheating with, Eddie Cibrian? Also, look how much hate Kristen Stewart got compared to Rupert Sanders. He was the married one with kids, but it was Kristen who got the brunt of the haters. How about Brad and Angelina? Who got (and still gets) the hate on that one?

The sad thing is that most of this hate comes from other women. Why is that? Why do women go for the jugular on women they think are cheating on or with a man but they don't go for the men?!

Here are 12 reasons why women blame the other woman instead of the unfaithful man.

Because we think appealing to sisterhood will be more successful than appealing to a guy's morality.

Because the man is paying our bills or helping pay our bills and the other woman isn't.

Because other women are a threat to us and we're scared sh*tless of them. (see above)

Because we love him and don't know her or hate her.

Because we can be as misogynist as men. Even more so.

Because we think if she goes away, the problem goes away.

Because we'd rather think the woman has cast some kind of slutty spell over our man than that he's just a cheating ass.

Because we think the problem is her, not him.

Because it's safer to send out hate to a woman than a man -- the guy could kick our ass.

Because it's easier to hate her than to break up with him.

Because hating her is cheaper and easier than a divorce.

Because he tells us it's all the other woman's fault and we choose to believe him rather than face that he might be lying. Because a cheater doesn't lie, right?

Have you ever blamed the woman instead of the man when it comes to cheating? Why?


Image via Oparraziphotos/Flickr

breakups, celebs, cheating


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BubbsJNL BubbsJNL

If she doesn't KNOW that he's married - no blame on her.

If she does, then she's as much to blame as he is though you shouldn't be as HURT by her as you are by him.  There's a reason that vows are said in public.


Susie19 Susie19

I agree with BubbsJNL.  If the other woman doesn't know, then she's not to blame at all, but if they both know that they are causing harm then both of them are assholes (Ex- Eddy and Leann).

tsk tsk

Chalon King

Just assume if you are not giving it up at home he is getting it elsewhere - hate to go against my fellow ladies, but very rarely do you get a cheater that is just malicious, it is a combination of things.  I also never understood hating the other person.  Your spouse and yourself are the main problems.  The other woman is just a vagina.  Most of the time your husband loves you but just needed some nookie.  And ladies you have to give it up on a reg basis or they will stray.  No if ands or butts about it.

nonmember avatar Rach

@Chalon- um no. Men are not just sex organs. Most men do not cheat in general. If they do, the cheating is 100% on them, even if there are problems within the marriage, that is no excuse. Going outside of said marriage fixes nothing.

Mrscj... Mrscjones

Preach Chalon. Most men don't stray just because and if he do that is between you two. If she know you should be mad at her but not as much as the person you are in the relationship with.

mamaj... mamajen82

It's just plain easier to be mad at HER than it is him. Cowardly? yes... Easier? definitely...

nonmember avatar Tigerese

This why men stay winning. They've managed to convince their spouses that they are innocent victims of "rape" incapable of thinking for themselves. Just ignore all of his inviting text messages, lingerie purchases, penicillin prescription, and secret children.

Cynthia Parten

Honestly, even if the other woman knows he is married I still don't blame her. Unless she is my sister, family member, or best friend, she has no loyalty to me. Is it a lousy thing to do to come on to a married man? Of course. But again, she has no loyalty to me. SHE didn't take the vows. HE did. I don't care if every woman strips down naked in front of him, my husband is responsible for telling them no. Frankly, I think it's because women like to blame other women for everything. If a woman comes on to a married man, people say that of course he was going to sleep with her . . . he's a man. I would expect my husband to have more self control than that, but other women don't. 

nonmember avatar A Guy

Doesn't matter. They're both at fault. Since it's a highly emotional issue, few involved parties

stara... starandseen

Interesting topic. I've always wondered why wives hate the other eoman, someone whom they don't even know, instead of.their husbands. I actually asked my husband that he said it's because wives think their man is good. Umm, that makes sense but he us still partially to blame for choosing to go to her.

I personally think its because the other woman is in the way, that if she weren't around he wouldn't have strayed in the first place, so that's why the wife hates her, not the husband.

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