Sex Confession: I Have X-Rated Dreams About My Ex (And I'm Happily Married!)


woman dreaming"Sex Confessions" is a series featuring your naughtiest bedroom secrets and fantasies. Some will sound familiar, others may give you ideas, some will turn you on, and some are dark and twisted. You might want to sit down for this.

Today's sex confession comes from Carla* who swears she's happily married, enjoys a great sex life with her husband, but cannot stop dreaming about her ex. Actually, a few exes. She has sex dreams about them -- vivid, intense sex dreams where she wakes up feeling like it was really happening and it makes her want to get it on with her husband. But then she feels weird about it and guilty that some former flames in her life are invading her dreams and having sex with her. Read on to hear more from Carla.

If it happened once, then I wouldn't think it was a big deal. Twice, three times even. But these sex dreams keep on happening. I probably have one a week and it's not always the same ex -- though it's been the same three exes who keep making porno appearances in my naughtiest dreams. I wake up feeling like I'm on the verge of orgasm. Intense! And then I lay there re-living the dream all while my husband is snoring next to me. What the heck?!?! This is just wrong wrong wrong. But I cannot control my mind when I sleep. I feel like it's a form of cheating. Why mind, why? Please stop!

I'm a happy wife, a sexually satisfied happy wife. And a mom. And I work. I have plenty of other crap to dream about like my kids growing up and making tons of money so they can buy me a dream house. See that? Dream house. Why can't I dream about a dream house? Instead I'm thinking about ex number 1, 2, and 3 doing the nasty to me. Separately of course. Thankfully I don't have orgy dreams. I would probably have myself committed or get a lobotomy if that starts happening.

Am I repressing something? It's not like these exes had some super secret way to sex me up that my husband doesn't know about. In fact, I like having sex with my husband the best. That's kinda why I married him. Well, I loved him and wanted to have his babies, but the lovemaking was primo!

I can't talk to anyone about this of course. But I'll be reading your comments with all ears hoping I'm not alone and not some wackadooble sex fiend with some hangups on dudes I really don't care about anymore.

What would you say to this confessor? Can you relate? Do you think it's a form of cheating? Or totally normal?

*Name has been changed.

Image via slightly everthing/Flickr

marriage, sex confession


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

linzemae linzemae

We can't control our dreams. I think she may be having more of them because she keeps thinking about them. It's definitely not cheating!

nonmember avatar Michelle

It's refreshing to see other women write about something I thought made me completely WEIRD! This will happen to me on occasion as well. And NO, it's not cheating! How in the hell could it possibly be considered such? I think your normal, healthy, and your brain just happens to pick that particular "movie" for the night :)

llcmommy llcmommy

Different men in our lives do different things. Even though my husband is a better fit for me, it doesn't mean that he was the funniest, best looking, or sexually driven man in my life. completely natural. 

the4m... the4mutts

Perfectly normal! Don't beat yourself up about it :)

tbruc... tbrucemom

It's completely normal and I'm sure your husband wouldn't mind you waking him up and taking advantage of your aroused state!

nonmember avatar T

Your not alone. Take advantage of that horniness & surprise your hubby by iniating some 2am love making!

nonmember avatar a

Im married and very happy, have a 14 month old, my husband' is my best friend but lately i've been having very intimate dreams about my ex like the sex is passionate and steamy and you know sexy thing is this ex of mine wasn't the best boyfriend im pretty sure i was just sex to him in a way he would tell me he loved me but he was in the military so when he went in we broke up bit when he came home we got back together for the month but i got sick of no commitment with him so i found my husband, i started dati my husband and half way through our relationship my ex came home again and i broke up with my husband and slept with my ex the next day finally telling my ex i wanted something serious he said he was going to Japan and that he loved me but he wasn't sure sohe left again for 6month s while he was gone i moved in worth my husband now and i haven't talked to my ex since except in my dreams where we are having extremely passionate sexi don't understand what's going on ... i always wake up feeling like i missed him and then that whole day i don't stop thinking about him! What is going on with me

Heather Marie Pollard

I am happily married as well and have sex dreams with just one of my exes almost once a week. I just looked it up and found you. Thanks for sharing now I don't feel fo alone!

1-8 of 8 comments