10 Things My Husband Says ... Only in My Dreams

Love & Sex 40

Last week, I wrote a list of the things my children never say, like, "Mommy is on the phone right now, so let’s entertain ourselves quietly," and "You’re in the bathroom? OK, I’ll wait to ask you my unimportant question." Some of the statements proved to be pretty universal, and it made me wonder if the same could be said for spouses. The following are statements I only dream of hearing my husband utter. Do these things go unsaid in other homes, too?

1. Let me load the dishwasher. The mess in the kitchen is really bothering me.

2. I'd really like for you to try a new, exotic recipe! Maybe you can even use the Crock-Pot!

3. I was thinking I'd get the kids up early and take them to a park today.

More from The Stir: 11 Ways You Know Your Relationship Is Over

4. Here's the remote. You can pick what to watch.

5. I love the new pink hue of my undershirts! You should wash your red socks with my whites more often!

6. You could really use some new black yoga pants. Why don't you head to Target?

7. I just love driving your car. It's so ... well cared for! 

8. What was it that you wanted me to do? I'd love to do it now before you have to ask me again.

9. Here, take all of the blanket.

10. Those dirty socks balled up by the bed? Those are mine. I'm going to go un-ball them and put them in the hamper.

What does YOUR husband never, ever say?


Image via Scary Mommy



To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

kjbug... kjbugsmom1517

Lmao! The cooking one.... my husband will pick the most labor intensive recipe and ask me to make it even with a crock pot. I hate cooooking sooo bad. And if there is to much prep involved i wont make it lol

Sirena Robinson

For me, the thing I want to hear. "Here honey, you stay in bed while I get up with the baby". No matter how many times I'm up through the night while he snoozes or how many mornings I get up with her early because he has to go to work, I have not ONCE heard that on his days off. Instead I get a litany on why he's so tired and that jarring shake when he wakes me up after two hours sleep to tell me that the baby is up AGAIN. *sigh*

nonmember avatar Lynn

If my husband ever informed my hardworkin' homemaker ass that the mess in the kitchen was really bothering him, he'd find out what a real mess was...

the4m... the4mutts

I'm very lucky. Mine says ALL of those :)

He's not perfect or anything, but he's pretty great. The only thing I wish he would say more, or ever for that matter, is

"Look what I got you for *insert occasion here*"

In 4 years he has only bought me 1 present. It was something I circled in a magazine, and he only got it because we had been fighting for a month. He hoped it would shut me up haha

Carly Rau

'Sure honey, i'll clean the dishes and the cat litter right now, theyre my only 2 chores around here, might as well do them!' ooooh dream husband...

nonmember avatar Candice

"Sure, I would love to help you with the newest Pinterest project you want to start"!!!!!!!

Butte... ButterflyEyesxX

When my boyfriend asks me "Is there any other deet you would like to share about your day?" (I'll be damed if my girl got hit on today, like everyday, I wanna hear what's new on the guy radar). Hehe I know him like a book :-]

Jennifer Kupper Swan

Honey, I know I change my diet weekly and you are already dealing with so much when it comes to cooking for two kids with life-threatening allergies and my mom with her allergies and intolerances, but I will take care of cooking and shopping for my breakfast, lunch and dinner.  And just to help you out because I know I will make a huge mess as a result, I will do all of the dishes.

He better not say it though, I might fall over dead LOL

RaeAn... RaeAnne.USAF

The socks! Oh god yes those fucking socks!!!!!!!!!

Young... YoungHold

My husband often hands me the remote to "drive", and is totally an enabler as far as shopping and buying things for myself.
What I want are small things, and it's still teamwork. 
We made a deal when I was pregnant that I would take care of all the dishwasher worthy dishes, and HE would do the things that could not go in there.  I'd love for him to honor that deal.
Also, I do almost all the laundry (sorting, washing, drying, bringing upstairs).  If he could just put it away that would be fantastic.

And  yeah.  Turn the damned socks right side out and put them in the hamper.

1-10 of 40 comments 1234 Last