8 Tips for Dating in Your 30s Without Going Completely Crazy

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Dating in your 20s is a whole 'nother ballgame than dating in your 30s.

Times change, we grow and learn, and frankly, I wouldn't go back to those days if you paid me (okay, if you paid me a LOT I might ... maybe).

Being in your 30s comes with a lot of pretty rad changes - you're wiser, you're smarter, you've learned what you want and what you don't, and you're ready to find someone worthy of you. Because you're awesome.

Here are some tips for dating in your 30s.

1) Opt for men, not boys. Men in their 20s are a different breed from men in their 30s. Like you, they've gotten their lives together and are ready to find out what they want from a partner.

2) Learn to let the small stuff go. It's NOT all small stuff (contrary to the popular book), but there are a lot of fights you'd have had in your 20s that you've now learned are NOT WORTH IT.

3) Look for a partner who shares the same values and beliefs that you do. It's a vital part of any relationship, but in your 30s, you're more likely to know what you stand for. Find someone who matches that.

4) Relax if you haven't found Mr. Right. You're now older, sexier, wiser, and MORE full of the awesome. You don't need to rush in and out of relationships as quickly as you change your nail polish.

5) Enjoy those quiet moments alone. Dating in your 20s has a lot of we! must! spend! every! second! together - but dating in your 30s? You can enjoy those moments alone, doing what YOU want to do.

6) Don't settle for less than you deserve. You've done it before - we all have - but it's time to look your relationship in the face and ask yourself "is this what I want?" and be able to answer it.

7) If it's not working, and you don't think it's going to, dump him. Yeah, it's not particularly NICE to be so harsh, but really, why waste YOUR time on someone who is decidedly NOT worth it.

8) Remind yourself that it's okay to be weak in front of your partner sometimes. It's hard, when you're used to doing things your way, to want to behave as though you need someone. Relationships are always give and take - remember that.

Any other advice for dating in your 30s?


Image via justDONQUE.images/Flickr



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nonmember avatar Jessica

Thanks for this article. Not all of us are lucky enough to meet Mr. Right in high school or college.

ImaSo... ImaSoulMom

Cool! Starting to date again is scary ;)

jessi... jessicasmom1

true!! always go for the older more stable men

Jesicalyn Mary Potter

or to avoid that you could get married before you hit the big 30 :)... Not that I have anything against 30 year olds... my husband was 34 when I married him... I was 19. For me and my life 30 seems a little old for ME to do anything life changing. I want my life fufilled by the time im 25. (had all my kids, married, Bought a house) But this article is good for if my husband ever dies and I find myself single again at 30 and finding myself needing another husband.

nonmember avatar j'smom426

wow jess thanks for the typical snarky married womans comment. why did you read this article anyway? so you could spew this condescending ass comment? or could you not tell that it was geared towards SINGLE women?

Jesicalyn Mary Potter

aparently some people are a little touchy today... My previous comment was a JOKE... As I said in my comment, had you read it, I have nothing against 30 something year olds...my husband is that age, and I read it because its a free country and I wanted to see the scoop should anything happen to my husband.. Im sorry I have high expectations for myself, and your reading comprehension sucks. And had it not been for my dad owing a debt to my husband I would not be married right now either. And my name is Jesicalyn not Jess, and if you were to call me Jess Its Jes.

jsmom426 jsmom426

so people who arent married by the age of 30 dont have 'high expextations' for themselves?? ok

Jesicalyn Mary Potter

No.. Jsmom428. I said I have high expectations for MYSELF I want my life complete by the time I am 25. I have had a life plan since I was 10. I graduated early had kids early and married early. My pace is not for everyone and that is fine. However, I cannot see MYSELF Doing any of these things after 30. It would not fit into MY life plan. but if for some reason you do see yourself waiting, by all means do so. My husband was 34 when I married him. And again read the second to the last line on my last comment. I AM A DEBT PAID TO MY HUSBAND FROM MY FATHER! I AM A PAYMENT! had my dad not owed that debt I would still be single! So quit thinking I am talking about everyone when I am TALKING ABOUT MYSELF AND MY EXPERIANCES!

nonmember avatar MarriedMale

Wow. I dont know who is worse scum. Your father for offering you as a debt payment, or your husband for accepting such. You talk as if you don't see anything wrong with that. Do you wear a burqa too?

Andi Dodd

Oh holy crap... If my father offered me up as payment owed to a man 15 years older than me, I'd have left town as fast as possible.  I sure wouldn't be acting holier than thou on a message board pretending it was all part of my "life plan" that I put together when I was 10.  

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