At any given moment of the day, most of us are multi-tasking. Texting while cooking and watching TV. Reading while commuting and listening to Pandora. So it definitely seems to follow that singles these days aredoing the same thing in their love lives. Apparently, the latest trend in searching for a partner is called "multi-dating."
A recent survey revealed nearly a quarter of single women are dating up to three men at the same time. (Whoohoo, you go, ladies!) And a Daily Mail writer named Pippa Wright recently admitted that she's one of them. She's been on 50 dates in six months in an attempt to find The One. I know -- but it's not as shocking as it sounds. Intense "multi-dating" isn't exactly a new concept. It's simply what single women -- usually those living in big, hectic, busy cities -- often have to do to find the right partner.
Once upon a time when I was a single girl livin' in L.A., my roommate told me she was impressed with how much I dated. I was going about it as if it was a second job, because I was that serious about finding someone and starting a real, long-term relationship.
I'd definitely date multiple guys at once, following the "safety rules of multi-dating" Wright notes, which include keeping dates short, not drinking too much, meeting somewhere public (and preferably a place you know so you're not stranded in a strange neighborhood) and always telling a friend where you're going. Until I met a guy with whom things felt truly right -- which wasn't 'til I met my now-fiance -- I felt like there was no reason to devote all of my time and energy to any one guy.
Doing what Wright and I did may sound stressful -- it can be -- but it turns out to be the best bet statistically for launching a happy relationship. The average single woman who dates just one man at a time goes out with just five men a year. As Pippa puts it, "Five dates a year? It's hardly trying, girls." Like it or not, you're definitely lowering your odds when you focus on just one potential partner at a time. I strongly believe the more you put yourself out there, the better your chances will be for finding the right one.
I know it can occasionally feel heartless to date so many guys at once, but it's in a single gal's best self-interest to. (Also, what do you think they're doing?) Until you know you confirm (verbally is usually best) that you're both into one another enough to put commitment on the table, there's no reason not to keep moving forward and saying "NEXT!" You're just doing what you gotta do to find love.
Would you or did you "multi-date"?