Sex Confession: My Man Only Likes Me When I'm Shaved Down There

Say What!? 15

razor"Sex Confessions" is a series featuring your naughtiest bedroom secrets and fantasies. Some will sound familiar, others may give you ideas, some will turn you on, and some are dark and twisted. You might want to sit down for this.

Today's sex confession comes from Carey*, a 27-year-old who has been dating the same guy for eight years. Mike* hasn't proposed yet even though they have a 3-year-old daughter and Carey has mentioned numerous times how she wants to get married. But we're not going to delve into that, exactly. Carey wants to talk about how her man insists she is shaved or waxed completely hairless down below. And if she ever does let it grow, Mike acts like a complete jerk about it. Read on to hear more in her own words.

So I don't really want to bitch about Mike because generally he is a great guy to me and a really great dad to our daughter. I know he loves me, treats me well, takes care of things, is respectful and loving, and all that good stuff. But he is obsessed with my vagina having absolutely no hair at all. It's such a weird thing, isn't it?

To his credit, when we first started dating, I was the one who loved Brazilian bikini waxes and got them every month. He loved them, too. Then when I got pregnant with our daughter, I stopped getting them. And they are really expensive, too, so after I had the baby, I didn't resume getting them. Mike would give me the money to get them. Had spa days all set up for me on the weekend where he would stay with our daughter and I'd be able to get a wax and a pedicure. This might sound like some people's dream, and I loved the me time, I really did. I just was kind of over getting the Brazilian wax. And once Mike told me I sort of had to get it because that's the only way he liked it, it made me sad. And made me not want to get them anymore.

What the heck is wrong here? Is it me? Is it him? I just don't get why he is so overly concerned about it and why it has to be that way. It's not like I let it grow really long and bushy when I have let it go. I keep it trim and neat. I have asked him and he just very bluntly says that's how he prefers it. And then wonders why I complain about having my own spa day every month. I want to yell that I prefer we were married, but you haven't proposed yet. But I don't.

To keep the peace, I just get them. But I don't want to anymore. It's a waste of money that I'd rather spend on my kid, or save for something else.

What advice would you give to Carey? Have you ever experienced something similar where your man insists you do something?


*Names have been changed.


Image via scottfeldstein/Flickr

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AniAngel AniAngel

First thought, if he can't pony up with a wedding date maybe the ground is a little shaky for demanding a hair free vagina. Though if you've been at it a long time it's probably not that painful, save some money, buy a can of hard wax and do it yourself. I know that sounds crazy but I do, I taught many a friend how, it's really kind of idiot proof.



In a long term relationship, that's almost all good, you have to pick your battles and it sounds like this just isn't one of them. Now the marriage battle that's another story. He's setting up his daughter for choosing the man of her dreams by being a great father, doesn't he want that man to marry her? Lead by example... Just a thought.

Ander... Anderbee28

I'm with you Ani... having a preference is one thing, making that sort of demand is something else entirely. I don't think I'd want to marry the kind of guy that doesn't accept all of my decisions, and the reasons for not getting regular waxes are perfectly valid- they are expensive! If you wanted to go hairless another way, that's perfectly fine. But it's perfectly fine not to, as well.

nonmember avatar gigimama

He sounds very controlling. It is YOUR body and while a partner's preferences should be taken into account, I don't see him taking ~your~ preference into account. He isn't respecting your wishes and opinions regarding your body. Are you still going to have to be bald when you're 75? When will he grow up?

By demanding you do this for him, he is treating you like an object or something he owns. His money, his rules.

Additionally, I'd ask him how he'd feel if a man treated your daughter the same way...demanding something of her she didn't want to give, not respecting her wishes. Sometimes, appealing to the protective side may open his eyes.

the4m... the4mutts

Who's vagina is it? Yours or his?

Once you answer that question, you will know what to do.

Doomy234 Doomy234

I would just stop doing it and start shaving instead. He might throw a bitch-fit for a while but eventually he'll get used it it. It is YOUR body after all. If women always did what men wanted with our bodies, we'd all have boob jobs and be permanent sex toys. Do what you feel is right. Plus, think of all the extra stuff you could get with the cash you are saving not getting waxed all the time. You could even get something nice for the both of you. ;)

nonmember avatar JoeBlow

The phrase "he only likes it when...." is never a good sign. ONLY is the problem word here.

Sounds like a bit of a jerk. There are a lot of things we'd all like, but if we get something close enough, most of us are happy.

nonmember avatar justathought71

It's funny how you can already see all the guys are going to say "what's the big deal, just keep getting the brazillian done" and all the women will turn it into a "he's trying to control you battle." I say anyone who's in a loving, committed, relationship, that know's exactly what his/her partner likes sexually, and has done it in the past, and is now changing her tune mid-relationship (for whatever reason) is asking for trouble. No doubt the wedding ring hasn't appeared yet, since he's probably thinking it's a slippery slope here. First, no more waxes....then, as soon as we're married, the sex disappears, cuz her interests are already changing.

mytra... mytrailsend

I like myself smooth down there and I know my SO does too, but if its not it doesn't stop him nor does he make a comment...actually I'm more uncomfortable ...just saying ....pick your battles...the marriage issue seems to be the bigger...um issue

nonmember avatar kaerae

So he gets bent out of shape if you look like you've gone through puberty? No red flags there...

nonmember avatar Birdie

My significant other told me early on he prefers it bare down there. I told him I do not, it's painful and my skin is super sensitive and breaks out when I do a complete hair removal. I keep it neat and trim, which is my personal preference. He is still with me and it hasn't been a problem. After all I don't make him wax his shoulders and butt!

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