When it comes to getting it on, all the books point to guys racing from 0 to 60, while women need a lot more warming-up time. And while it may take a woman a little longer to completely get in the mood, there's one thing she can do rather quickly: get turned OFF.
Guys are the masters at saying just the wrong thing. It might be because we have thicker skin and generally joke a bit too harshly with our wives. Or maybe we're just missing that tiny chip in our brains that normally would say, "Dear God, just shut up! Do NOT say that to her!" Either way, we sometimes say the wrong thing at the wrong time.
Want to learn from our mistakes? Then read on for 7 things that will turn your wife off from having sex with you tonight.
1. I thought you were on a diet. No, no, no. Never, ever mention anything food-related. If she's on a diet and you catch her elbow deep in a can of Pillsbury frosting, just smile and ask her if she'd like a spoon.
2. I had this crazy dream about you and your sister getting it on. Some dreams are better kept to yourself.
3. I was having lunch with an old girlfriend of mine and ... It doesn't matter how you end that sentence. The words "I," "lunch," and "girlfriend" are a seriously bad combo sure to send you to the doghouse for a week.
4. Did you see that tight sweater Cindy was wearing today? Yes, your wife saw it. But she really doesn't need (or want) to know that you're completely fixated on her friend's chest.
5. After eating those triple chili and cheese dogs for lunch, I spent all afternoon in the crapper. Sometimes TMI is a mood killer.
6. I can't believe you bought another pair of shoes. Don't you have enough already? Never, ever talk about a woman's weight, age, or shoe collection. Period.
7. The guys and I thought we'd hit that new strip club in town right after work. Yeah, after you watch young women shake their ta-tas, there's a next-to-slim chance your wife will be as accommodating.
What does your husband say that completely turns you off?
Image via Scarleth White/Flickr
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Comments 30
I think sometimes we women are too sensitive.... I mean look at this list.
1. You're right honey. ::puts junk food away::
3. Oh yeah? How is she doing?
4. Yes I did! I forgot to ask her where she bought that.
7. Oh cool tell me if they're worth the money!
The others either don't apply bc I don't go overboard on shoes or other clothing and bc I don't have a sister. But the point is, we are too sensitive. Lighten up ladies!
'my Dh says, 'you're so pretty but you eat/drink/talk too much'....love the guy but there are days...
I totally agree. Stripclubs are off limits for a man whos in a committed relationship. It's disrespectful and a total slap in the face. And how much do you want to bet not one man would be cool with his wife going to a dick slinging fest to get turned on by other men and have them grind all over her. Would. Never. Be. Allowed. And its the women that allow such nonsense that make it so the the rest of the men can say all the other women are just jealous crazy bitches. Why don't you grab some dignity and admit that you don't REALLY like it that the man you love is oogling another woman's lady parts????
I have lots of shoes...
Some of those things althoug are natural slipups in a relationship doesn't mean they have any part in a commited relationship let alone a marriage. It's fine if you don't mind your partner getting his fill from some where else if you can't fulfill him but not every one has to be like you.
I don't critisize my friends for sharing that type of thing but honestly it doesn't bring you emotionally closer only sexually and although you can have both when the sexual pleasing come's before emotional there is an unhealthy veiw on your relationship.
I spent a while trying to figure out if my guy ever says anything that could be a turn off..... nothing came to mind lol