Nothing, and I mean nothing, changes your sex life like the arrival of a baby. You know how you feel at the prospect of having sex after giving birth. It may range anywhere from petrified to 100 percent good to go -- and maybe both, along with every feeling in between. But how is your husband feeling?
As it turns out, his feelings are probably just as complex as yours are. The good news? He still finds you sexy. Yes, you, in the slightly-too-tight yoga pants and the milk-stained nursing bra. That's what Ian Kerner, author of The Big, Fun, Sexy, Sex Book tells sex expert Dr. Logan Levkoff in the latest episode of MomEd: In The Bedroom. Check out the video after the jump.
Now more than ever, though, the key to keeping your sex life happy is to communicate. He's waiting for a cue from you that it's okay to make a move. If the thought of intercourse makes you nervous, then it's okay to take it off the table and do other things to bring you both pleasure, but don't wait until you feel 100 percent ready for intercourse before being intimate. And if you need a sexual self-esteem boost, tell him that too; let him know could use some nice compliments to warm you up.
Date nights are super important as well. Just getting to be together, alone, as a couple is vital to the health of your relationship. One real mind-blower for me was that men use sex as a channel of communication. Neglect sex, and it's your emotional connection that will take the hit.
Neither of our sexperts suggested this, but I'll tell you: if you can't afford a real date night or don't have a sitter, do a date night at home after the kids are in bed. Open a bottle of wine and sit on the patio and talk, snuggle up and watch a sexy, romantic movie, or have a picnic on the living room floor. Just do something to connect as a couple again and not as Mom and Dad -- and ban kid talk for at least the first hour!
Check out the show for more invaluable tips on how he feels about sex after baby.
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How do you keep the spark alive with your spouse?
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