Sex Confession: I Cheated & I Told My Husband

OMG 87

man woman kissing“Sex Confessions” is a series featuring your naughtiest bedroom secrets and fantasies. Some will sound familiar, others may give you ideas, and all will turn you on (well most). You might want to sit down for this.

Today's sex confession comes from a 32-year-old mother of one who has been married to her high school sweetheart for 10 years. But two years ago, she messed up. While she admits that it all started with a little flirting with a guy at a bar after having one too many drinks while out with her girl friends one night, she has taken it too far. As far as it could go. She's been cheating on her husband for a year with the one man. The man knows she's married. Her husband, however, didn't know about the other guy. Until a month ago. Here is what she revealed ....

I'm not proud of myself. It all started because I drank too much, which I rarely ever do. But I saw this guy, felt something, and went up and started talking to him. We kissed at the bar. It was sloppy, stupid, careless, and totally wrong. I promised myself I would never do that again. I'd never cheat on John* again. I love him. I love our life. I love our marriage. I would never want to jeopardize what we have especially because of our daughter. But I did. I saw the guy again. And again. And it's been a year. My relationship with James* isn't anything like my marriage. It is mostly sexual. John and I don't have sex very often. James fulfills that missing part. James knows all about my marriage and I finally came clean and told my husband.

More from The Stir: Woman Makes Out with Married Man in Bar & Then Tells the Wife

At first it seemed he was unwilling to forgive me. But he has. It's been a month since I told him and we've been working through it together. I didn't have to tell him. He had no idea what I had been doing. I wish I could erase the past year. But I can't. And that's the problem. I don't know how to break it off with James. I haven't seen him in a month. I keep putting him off. I haven't told him that my husband knows. I wish I just could never return his calls and never speak to him again. Though I know it's not that easy. I will run into him somewhere. And to be honest, I'm scared to talk to him because I don't completely trust myself to end it.

I need advice.

What advice would you give to this confessor?

 

*Names have been changed.

 

Image via Macnolete/Flickr

cheating, sex secret

87 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

nonmember avatar AmyAZ

Have your husband call him for you.

Felly... FellyScarlett

"It all started because I drank to much" what a lame excuse.

nonmember avatar J

You don't owe James an explanation. If you do run into him, you ignore him. What's most important now is restoring your marriage and your husband's faith in you. Focus on that, not on what James may be wondering.

Rebec... Rebecca7708

If you don't trust yourself to be faithful, you have no business being married. It doesn't matter how it started, you kept it going.

nonmember avatar N

Affairs bring out lots of judgements, and are scary to those on the outside looking in. But from what it sounds like you like something about the affair far more than you want your marriage. Otherwise the decision to be with, truly be with your husband if not easy would have your complete dedication. And it doesn't. Maybe the time has come for you to take a step back from both relationships and think, reflect. And maybe with some clarity you could stop from hurting... Because it is hurting everyone involved. No one wins. But a first step would be deciding to think, and then act with either the commitment of a woman who wants her marriage to work, or one that doesn't want to be married at all. Good luck.

nonmember avatar anonymous

It seems you have a choice to make. Either stay with your husband and make your marriage work or leave your husband and stay with James. If you choose to keep your marriage you have to own up to your actions and tell James goodbye. And not just say it but mean it. If you choose to stay with James, then understand you are not only ending your marriage, but ending the family your child has. If you were my friend, I'd tell you to think hard about this. In the end It's your choice but keep in mind that James cheated with you...and if he did it with you, how can you be sure he won't do it to you?

jalaz77 jalaz77

Hmmm counseling because she does not love her husband or her life. If she did she would not of carried on a one year long affair. She is not over the "other guy".

nonmember avatar anonymous

It seems you have a choice to make. Either stay with your husband and make your marriage work or leave your husband and stay with James. If you choose to keep your marriage you have to own up to your actions and tell James goodbye. And not just say it but mean it. If you choose to stay with James, then understand you are not only ending your marriage, but ending the family your child has. Is James worth it? If you were my friend, I'd tell you to think hard about this. In the end It's your choice but keep in mind that James cheated with you...and if he did it with you, how can you be sure he won't do it to you?

nonmember avatar Shelly

Get counseling. You obviously have a seriously lack of boundaries, and lack a moral compass. Be honest with yourself, you WANT to run into him. Your thinly veiled regret is pathetic.

nonmember avatar imho

She should consider herself lucky that her guy didn't beat her into a coma.

1-10 of 87 comments 12345 Last