Fundamentalists of all sorts better hope that the world does, indeed, end this December because heathenism is spreading faster than ever. There's a promising new development in the world of contraception, and this time, it doesn't involve a little pink pill and a whole lot of womanly hormones. Researchers have developed a gel that men can rub on their skin daily that will reduce their sperm count and thus the chance of unwanted pregnancy.
You hear that? Man gel contraceptive is here, and it's about to take over.
Because as soon as it's been tested and approved and all that good stuff, you know womankind is going to just flush their birth control down the toilet and start rubbing the hormonal gel on every man that passes by. It's their turn, after all, fair is fair. We've been swallowing, inserting, applying, and shooting baby antidotes into our bodies for decades, it's time we passed the parenthood prevention torch.
And for the record, I won't even indulge the argument that men can't handle the responsibility of contraception. Please.
We'll have to wait a while before we can fully transfer the responsibility over to the men folk, but as more research is conducted, the closer we come to living the dream. This latest study found that 89 percent of the men who applied this miracle gel had a very low sperm count at the end of six months with very few side effects.
There was no report of weight gain, water retention, mood swings, blood clots, pulmonary embolism, deep vein thrombosis, gallbladder disease, kidney stones, or renal failure -- all negative effects women have risked for years.
I look forward to the day when morning sperm-reducing gel application becomes as routine as shaving for men. Until then, keep fighting off that renal failure, ladies!
Thoughts on the future of male contraceptive?
Photo via M. Markus/Flickr