Picking a Time of Day for Sex Is More Complicated Than It Looks

LOL 14

couple in bedSome people are just morning people. They can get up at the crack of dawn, jog five miles, shower, get dressed, cook breakfast for the whole family, and read the newspaper before I'm even awake.

Me, on the other hand, I'm a night owl. I've always been one for as long as I can remember. Come 10 or 11 p.m. each night, I find myself working at my computer, and before I know it, it's 1:30 or 2 in the morning. Clearly this can cause some coordination issues with my marriage. Yes, I'm talking sex here, people.

If I go to bed late, my wife's already exhausted. She's definitely not in the mood. Or depending on the day, she may already be passed out by the time I get back into the bedroom. And for some reason she doesn't appreciate it when I pleasantly wake her up.

On the flip side, my wife's a morning person, so she's raring to go when the sun comes up. I'm either snoring away or so tired I can barely grunt a hello in her direction. Not many guys will say no to sex no matter what day, time, or place you're at. But going to bed super late and being woken up early for a few horizontal mambo lessons is downright exhausting. Heck, a week or two of it is enough to kill a man!

Plus with morning sex, there's the whole morning breath issue. You don't want to get up and brush your teeth because you're so exhausted to begin with. That's half the fun of morning sex, just waking up, rolling over, getting busy, and passing out again. But unfortunately, nobody in the entire universe wakes up with good breath. Which means kissing pretty much sits on the sidelines for this morning routine.

So what's a couple to do? Well, we could compromise and just meet for a lunch quickie regularly. We can set our alarms for 4 a.m. so we'd both be exhausted. I could start going to bed earlier or she could start going to bed later. The problem is, I'd start off going to bed earlier but after a few days, I'd just slip right back into my old late night routine.

We could pick a day and time to be together, but scheduling romantic encounters just seems so ... clinical. Kind of takes the fun out of it. What we have to do is get the kids to bed way earlier and then get ourselves in the mood with a good movie, music, atmosphere, etc. Unfortunately, that's easier said than done.

Actually, what we really need is sexsitters. Someone to watch our kids outside of our house while the two of us go at it. Except that means we'd basically be paying to have sex. And last time we looked, that's against the law.

Do you prefer sex in the morning or at night?

Image via Jerine Lay/Flickr

sex, sex drive


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Manda Valenti

i prefer it at night and my man prefers it...well....24/7. i like your idea of sexsitters. technically you're not paying for sex, just for the uninterupted time to get bizzay. i say go for the sexsitters. any adult would understand. heck, if any of my friends needed a free night, id be more than happy to help out with the understanding that when i have kids, they'll help me too. :) Happy Humping!

nonmember avatar Sheila

First let me commend you on a well written article.

Second... what is sex? Oh.. I think I have had that once or twice in the last 18 years of being with my hubby ;) LOL
Seriously, sex is one of the things that is so hot and heavy in the beginning of a relationship you never seem to have an issue finding time for it. But, as life moves on, kids come, bills, household chores, jobs, etc.. sex seems to be the last thing on the "to do" list for many. In this household, we kinda take turns. Hubby is a morning (or 3 am) person, me, I am a night person. So, we both give in to the other from time to time. Yeah, morning breath is not good, but who said you always have to kiss to have sex ;) If it helps, keep some breath spray on the night stand ;) I do know that one can have bad breath at night too.. especially after a heavy garlic pasta dish ;) LOL
Sex.. just take it when you can, because soon we will be to old to enjoy it at all.

nonmember avatar The Rebel Chick

I have two words for you that say you don't like it in the morning due to morning breath...."from behind."

butte... butterflyfreak

I like mid-afternoon best. Don't know why but right about mid-day, I'm raring to go. Which isn't so bad since my hubby doesn't leave for work until 1:30 BUT school's out for summer so there probably won't be any mid-day nookie until September. So, it has to be at night since my daughter often times is in bed with us in the morning. He generally stays up later than me, but I drag him back to the bedroom with me right before I go to bed. Then after I've had my way with him, he can go back to his gaming ot TV watching that he was doing before I interrupted him. :)

4cadi... 4cadillac

I prefer @ nite but the hubby prefers...24/7. There r 6 kids between us & we dont schedule tymes or have sexsitters. We jus go n our room 4 a quickie (or longie---depends on the mood). No need 2 pay a sitter. Some tymes ya just gotta do it! STOP PLANNING!

kjbug... kjbugsmom1517

Oh my this was funny! We get it when we can when the mood strikes. Whatever it takes. Some times r easier of course but yea. Gotta do what ya gotta do if its something u want ;)

nonmember avatar MarkInFlorida

I've got it! The night owl stays up late enough for the early bird to awaken! Then go for it. He then dozes off, she's ready for the day.

nonmember avatar ndh

I have this problem. I try to go to bed at the same time she does. If it works, great. If not, I get back up and read. No big deal---and it works for sex, too. We can do our thang at her normal bedtime; and if the proverbial post-coital sleepiness doesn't come, I just get up. Easy.

jessi... jessicasmom1

mostly the night of the day 

nonmember avatar Astro

Keep a small packet of Listerine breath strips next to the bed. Place one on each others' tongue and kiss morning breath goodbye.

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