Sex Confession: I Prefer My Sex Toy Over My Husband

Say What!? 21

messy bed“Sex Confessions” is a series featuring your naughtiest bedroom secrets and fantasies. Some will sound familiar, others may give you ideas, and all will turn you on (well most). You might want to sit down for this.

Today's sex confession comes from a 40-something mom of three, who has been (mostly) happily married for 15 years. She's happy. She swears she is. But when it comes to sex, she is just happier with her vibrator. Here's what she has to say in her own words.

I love my husband. We've enjoyed a really great sex life for many, many years. But for the past couple of years, I have not been interested in having sex with him. Kissing? Love it. Snuggling? Love that, too. But sex? Actual in and out sweaty takes too long sex? No thanks! I have no desire to be with anyone else except my vibrator.

I still manage to have the obligatory sex with him every once in a while and I do it for him -- to make him happy, which does make me happy, too. But I have no real physical excitement from it. I use my vibrator for that. And I pleasure myself with it at least three times a week. My husband has no idea about any of this. This is why I feel guilty. Sort of.

I guess you can say that I'm faking it when I do have sex with him. But like I said, his pleasure does bring me pleasure. I just have to get off another way. And I have even tried bringing my sex toys into our lovemaking but he is sort of traditional and isn't into that at all. He feels like it means he isn't man enough. But the truth is, this is about me, not him. I just love the control of pleasing myself. The ease of it. The quickness of how fast I can get to orgasm. The sensations of when I do! It's all my own. My private bliss. I just prefer sex solo.

What do you think of this confessor's secret? Should she feel guilty?


Image via scarycurlgirl_photos/Flickr

sex, sex toys


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nonmember avatar Jaye

That's just sad. If he knew OMFG.

nonmember avatar Shelly

How can someone who lives like this, be happy? Enjoying the intimacy of an inanimate object, more then a human being? Yeah...she's not happy. She's fooling herself. I feel sorry for her husband.

abra819 abra819

yeah, this is horrible :(

zandh... zandhmom2

I think this sounds an awful lot like stories I hear about women who husbands prefer to get off alone while watching porn.  I think it's sad to prefer a video or a vibrator over an actual person.  She really should back away from pleasuring herself for a while and see if she can go back to enjoying sex with her husband again.

Kimmy... KimmyKate

Sad and horrible?  No.  Realistic?  Yes!  Been with my husband 15 yrs. and feel pretty much the same way this woman does.  Am I delusional and kidding myself about being happy?  Nope, not at all...happy as I can be.  Then do I honestly love my husband?  Absolutely!  Get real above posters...this is pretty much the norm for me and my friends who have all been married about the same amount of time.  I applaud the writer for sharing and being truthful.  This is the 'true story' in way more wives lives than might want to admit.

4cadi... 4cadillac

I dont see anything wrong with how this woman feels. @ tymes we just want 2 "git 'er done" & relax. No fuss or sweat or talking!!! I get like that @ tymes also & understand hur completely.

nonmember avatar Chrissy

I swear people can be sooo judgemental, ok you may not feel this way but then again most of the posters saying that this is horrible probably have not been married as long as this woman. I see nothing wrong with her confession, she said she still has sex with her husband and he's happy with that. If that works for them than it's their business. I am only 25 and have been married for four years and even I can at least understand where she might be coming from. If she likes to get it on by herself than more power to her.

nonmember avatar MommieBennett2

I have been with my boyfriend/husband for 11 years we have 2 young kids, we don't need to be with each other all the times most times I think he is alone and thats just fine with me. I give when he lets it be known he wants it or I let him know. And yes very happy with each other

Vericima Vericima

Sounds to me like stories Ive heard of menopause, it's a drawing inward time. Maybe with a little bit of "doing it the same way for 15 yrs". From what Ive heard, she should go back to liking sex in a few years. She should also be honest with her husband about whats going on with her and their sex life. He might be understanding about the whole thing and be willing to try new things/toys. They do make stuff that will get you both at the same time.

fingers crossed

Momof... Momofsomekids

I would tell my husband that he isn't pleasing me the way I need. Bring the toy with the two of you and show him what you need. That's what I would do, but each to thei own

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