18 Pearls of Dating Wisdom You'll Need to Find True Love

heartI've never been one to give much dating advice, as I was a late bloomer who started dating in my early 20s. I was 26 before I found myself in a long-term relationship, and that lasted a decade. After that, I dated sporadically before entering another long-term relationship. But I finally feel I was in the game enough, and have spoken to enough single and married friends, and read enough articles, that I can offer some definitives when it comes to shopping for a partner.

So here it is. My pearls of dating wisdom. Mind you, there could be more. But we don't have all day. So I boiled it down to the points I want every woman beginning on her dating and relationship journey to know. Happy reading!

Sex. If it seems like he doesn’t ever really want to have sex, and he refuses to get a medical check-up to see if it’s anything physical, then he’s gay or having an affair. Don’t believe anything else. Yes, men do go through times when they are stressed and don’t want sex. But these don’t last months.

Lies. If you catch him in one lie, forgive. If you catch him in two, be wary. If you catch him in three, RUN.

Potential. Find a man you love AS IS, not a man you’ll love IF.

Issues. Whatever the issue is at the beginning, it will be the issue at the end. So make sure you can handle that issue, because it may go underground for awhile but it never truly goes away.

Guts. If something feels off, it’s OFF. Trust your gut. Don’t wait for proof. Even if you’re wrong, do you really want to be with a man who is always setting off your alarms?

More sex. Having it “too soon” won’t make a guy leave (unless he’s a jerk). But do know you are more likely than he is to become emotionally attached once you have sex.

Even more sex. If he cheats once, he may not cheat again, but things will never be the same. They could get worse, they could even get better. But the same? Nope.

Love. Nothing you can DO will make a guy love you. He either does or he doesn’t.

Resume. Don’t date a guy because you think you “should,” because he looks good on paper. That paper can -- and probably will -- change.

Chemistry. Sexual chemistry is important, but it does fade, so make sure there are other things holding you together.

Don'ts. Children don’t fix a relationship. Neither does marriage. If you have major doubts, don’t do either.

Happiness. You will never be 100% happy with your partner at all times. Stop even trying for it. But you should hover around 75% or higher.

Blame. Sometimes, you will do everything right, and it will still end up wrong. It’s just part of life. Don’t take on blame that isn’t yours to take.

More issues. Don’t date anyone if there are more than three big issues. You’ll have your hands full with the three.

Last resort. When in doubt, and you're not getting answers, and you're still in doubt, and you need answers, check his computer.

Pets. If you have them, make sure he's not allergic or hates them. Make sure NOW. Pets are for life.

Self-esteem. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about yourself.

Eyes. Watch what he does, it’s more important than what he says.

What are some of your dating guidelines?

Image via epSos.de/ Flickr

dating, commitment, love, sex


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Freela Freela

Totally agree with 'issues.'  If it's an issue at the start, it's likely always going to be an issue.  I've been married for 14 years this August.  Dh's family has always had an issue with me because of my ethnicity.  I thought that this would either improve with time, or that it would get easier to deal with over time.  It hasn't.  If anything, it has gotten harder since having children.  I don't know if it would have changed my mind, as my dh is absolutely the love of my life, but I very much underestimated how hard it would be to feel rejected by his family for 14 years.  And he probably underestimated how hard it would be be to be stuck in the middle for 14 years too. 

As for pets, I agree that pet people should probably marry pet people! My dh pulled a bait and switch on me... he was fine with pets when we first got together, but three kids and a mortgage later he does not want pets at all because, in his perspetive, they are just more work and more money spent.  This makes me really sad... I would love a dog and always assumed that dh would be open to the idea at some point in time.  He really liked the small animals we had before having kids, but doesn't even like them anymore. Makes me sad!

Mandago Mandago

All of these are great, except for the advice about checking his computer. If you need to spy, you need to leave.

nonmember avatar keaijvvv

1) The brand model
two) The Buttons
What's more, nearly every button will require the text 'Fred Perry' visibly embossed into it.
Currently, they have expanded their variety of offerings, as an illustration Fred Perry Footwear and add-ons, and now have also teamed up with numerous other brand names, designers and stars for collaborative employment. Celebrated European designer Raf Simons has designed engineered special collections with them for multiple seasons now, and so they also have a considerable number of seasons lined up for just a collaboration with singer Amy Winehouse.
There's an urban myth that claims that shirts by using a Green tag are almost always pretend, still this is often not definitely the situation. When the shirt you are looking at was designed in the past couple of decades, the tag will most likely be black or blue; although not inexperienced. However, when the shirt was crafted around the 90s there is a quite high quality prospect it'll be inexperienced. A Fred Perry polo shirt by having a green tag will both be ancient and/or phony, however it will never be new and authentic.


nonmember avatar kuangjcw

Steven Adler

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