How to Know Whether You're Bisexual - and What to Do About It

Love & Learn 21

While you're exploring your sexuality, it helps to think of it all on a spectrum. On one end, you have homosexual, or gay, and on the other, heterosexual, or straight. But what if you find yourself attracted to the cute guy next door - and the cute chick up the block?

What does this all mean? Are you bisexual?

Here are some ways to figure it out. 

There are two types of people who are attracted to both sexes: bisexual and bi-curious. People who are bi-curious are those who may be ready to explore their sexuality with a same sex partner. Bisexual people are those who know that they dig men AND women. As sexuality occurs along a spectrum, there are theories that we are all "a little bisexual."

Here are some clues you may be bisexual:

*You realize that you're not just crushing on people of the same sex, your feelings are deeper than a "bromance" or a "girl crush."

*You have sexual fantasies that you'd really like to make a reality about someone who is the same sex.

*You know it in your gut - your hips may lie, but your gut, well, your gut never leads you wrong.

*You look for QUALITIES in a partner, rather than people to date.

If you find yourself nodding at the above questions, you're probably pretty confused by it. That's okay. Most people whose sexual preference is not clearly on one side of the spectrum or the other can be very bewildered by it all.

Okay, so I'm pretty sure I'm bisexual (or at least, bi-curious). Now what?

Well, first, take a deep breath and remind yourself that it's NORMAL to feel a lot of conflicting emotions about your sexuality. If you feel that you are bisexual, it's time to explore your sexual boundaries with men and women. Here are some tips:

*Find some online groups for local GLBT groups (youth or adult, depending on your age) that may meet in your area. It's there that you can find some people who are going through the same things.

*Experiment. The one sure-fire way to find out if you're attracted to people of both sexes is to experience what it's like to be with them. No, not like a threesome, but independently.

*While you experiment, do so safely. Even same-sex couples run the risks for STDs and other medical problems.

*Do not try and experiment with a good friend unless he or she is into it. Sex has ruined a lot of perfectly good friendships, and you want people in your corner.

*Talk about your feelings with someone you trust. If that means calling a GLBT hot-line to discuss your feelings, so be it. Sometimes advice from strangers is a lot easier to manage than advice from people you know.

*Remember that you are normal. You are perfect just as you are. There is NO shame in being bisexual, bi-curious, gay, straight, transgender - no shame at all. Hold your head high.

Any other tips for bisexuality?

 

Image via morbuto/Flickr

hooking up, dating, sex confession, sexuality