I'll readily admit that -- like most women in America right now -- I'm engrossed in E.L. James' Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy. No shame here! Knowing that it began as Twilight fan fiction, I can't help but envision Christian Grey as RPatz and Anastasia Steele as KStew. But a'course, unlike Twilight scribe Stephenie Meyer, James is actually giving us what we want: A whole lotta SEX! Whoohoo! Unfortunately, just like her, she's made a dangerous misstep when it comes to the romance between her leading lovers.
Although Christian is ultimately a three-dimensonal, sympathetic character, he's also described repetitively as mercurial. Ana can't keep up with his ever-changing moods that blow breathtakingly hot to bone-chillingly cold. At least through most of the first book, Fifty's mysterious nature and hair-trigger mood swings have Anastasia walking on eggshells, petrified that he's going to snap. And this is somehow supposed to be ... sexy as hell?
I'm sorry, but what a crap message to send women!
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Anyone who has ever been with a man like that knows better. Being intimate with a man who you can't read, who is always playing mind games, who makes you feel like you have to be perpetually "on" in a way that doesn't come naturally doesn't make most women feel like they're Aphrodite or have their "inner goddess" doing cartwheels. It makes us feel like sh*t! Not to mention that having to endure that kind of behavior from a guy is exhausting. And in the most extreme cases, I wouldn't hesitate to call it emotional abuse.
What's more, women who find themselves believing that manipulative, mind-effing Christian Grey-like behavior is a-okay -- worse yet, attractive -- are only setting themselves up for failure in love.
I've been there. (Sigh ... Haven't we all?) And it wasn't until I got a good hard shake from a big sister-like roommate that I realized putting up with a guy like that was going to prevent me from finding someone worthy of me -- someone who could offer a real, stable relationship. Not long after she helped me see the light, I found my now-fiance, and every so often, in talking to single girlfriends who are dealing with shady Grey-like characters, I try to pass that wisdom along.
There are certainly aspects of Ana and Christian's relationship in Fifty Shades of Grey that are hot -- I'll give E.L. that much. But as far as equating mercurial mood swings and constant guessing games with a satisfying physical and emotional bond? Sounds more like a nightmare than a fantasy come true.
Have you ever been in a relationship with a standoff-ish, "mercurial," even manipulative guy like Christian Grey? Do you think it's wrong to glorify that kind of bad behavior?
Image via Barnes & Noble
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Comments 69
Take the book for face value. She is saying a powerful man is sexy. he has ana's best interest at heart and he's admittedly controlling. keep that in mind and it's just a fun read. they are calling it mom porn. now when you watch porn and there's a gangbang going on, they are not saying hey! wouldn't it be hot if your man screwed 10 girls at once? no! it's just for entertainment value. take it for aynthing more than that and you're just not mature enough to handle some dirty fun!
I haven't read it, but I intend to. From all the comments, ---I am intrigued. However, if it is poorly written I doubt I'll get very far into it. I have high standards in literature. I insist on a well-written story !
If your standards are that high IndigoRose you may want to find some excerpts online before buying. I was not impressed with the writing and I gave all 3 books a shot hoping for improvement. I have a hard time with a few things in these books: A) is the fact that for being considered such an "adult subject" it was too easy to read with lots of repetitive statements and wording. I finished book 1 in 2 days, and all 3 in less than a week. B) Any book classified as erotica should never ever be allowed to refer to the female genitals only as "down there", "there" or "my sex" for 3 books. C) I found myself always waiting and wanting something more exciting I guess.
I didn't hate the books. I found their banter very humorous and their characters are fun. I do think that a more experienced writer may have pulled it off better and I think it could have been much more interesting and steamy story. It is not erotica; it's a love story, and a story of someone who needs to be saved from their own self. I kept reading because I had to know how they story ended. I kind of wish I would have stopped halfway through book 3 or something. I hated how it ended... Completely BORING ending in my opinion...
Since it was based on the Twilight series, I was quick to discard this book. But since many gals were talking about it, I decided to borrow a free ebook copy from a friend (there's NOOOO WAY I would waste my money on the Twilight books, let alone these!)
I'm halfway through the second book. Not too bad. Although the "Oh, my"s, and puerile angst seem to be waaay too many, it's junk food literature at its best.