It's only been six months since Russell Brand filed for divorce from Katy Perry, but word has it that Russ is regretting their break-up BIG time. Isn't that just like a man? Supposedly, Russell sent Katy an email saying that their divorce was a "mistake" and asking for another chance.
Oh, really, Russell? Didja have a glass of wine -- wait, you don't drink booze, so, a glass of cranberry juice -- sit down at the computer, and shoot off an email? How long did that take, 10 minutes? You're an author of two books, so I know it didn't take a huge amount of effort.
Gee, Katy is sure to be impressed with that! (Sarcasm.) Russell, dude, I like you. I thought you were hilarious in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and Get Him to the Greek. So, I'm going to give you some advice. If you want to get Katy back, you need to listen to me.
First off, my man, an email is not going to do the trick. I know that you and Katy live in different countries, but who cares! You have plenty of money, and you can make your own schedule to a certain extent. Get your butt on a red-eye and get to where Katy is.
Word has it, Russell, that you are regretting the divorce because you saw pictures of Katy with another man and are seething with jealousy. This is not a good reason to reunite! Once you're back together, all of the jealousy will be gone, and you'll be standing there dealing with the same issues that drove you apart to begin with. So do NOT mention your jealousy to Katy.
This brings me to the most important thing you can do to try and win your ex back: Offer to get into therapy with her. You can say a million sweet nothings, but nothing says, "I'm serious about making this work" like saying, "Doll, let's see a shrink." And don't just SAY it. DO it. Find the counselor yourself. Call (don't email!) Katy and say, "I've found this wonderful therapist, can I make an appointment for us?"
Last of all, don't try for make-up sex. Do everything you need to do to show Katy you are serious BEFORE you try to bump knees. Otherwise, she will assume it's not your heart talking, but a different organ.
Good luck, Russ. Lemme know if it all works out for ya.
Have you ever tried to get an ex back? How'd you do it?
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