It’s on bishes! Just a couple of weeks after Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie announced their engagement, word has it that Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux are getting married. Supposedly Jen and Justin were checking out an exotic little hotel in Greece as a possible site for their wedding. Who even knew they were engaged? Why, only last week, they were about to break up, weren't they?
But of course they’re engaged, people. Wouldn’t you rush to the altar if your ex-husband and the woman he left you for were also headed down the aisle? There’s no way I’d let my wasband get away with that. As if! So let the wedding race begin!
So anyway, I imagine Jen was checking out the isle of Crete for her big day because she’s Greek. Crete also happens to be where Jen’s dad, soap actor John Aniston, was born.
The blabbermouth hotel source who spilled the beans says that Jen hasn’t exactly settled on his hotel for their nuptials but, hey, why not tell the press about it anyway? It’s great publicity, even if it does virtually guarantee that your little business is now out of the running.
Speaking of running, who will say their "I do"s first? Jen and Justin? Brad and Ange? If I were Jen, I’d be absolutely determined to get a ring on it first. Take that, Ange! If only the foursome would agree to let this all be filmed. It'd be like Amazing Race combined with Bridezillas.
Whether or not any of this is based in reality, it’s just the rumor we needed to keep the JenBrangelina triangle alive in our imaginations, and keep the tabloids scribbling away.
After the wedding race is over, then they can start the all-important baby race! Oh wait, Brangelina already won that one. Over and over and over.
So let's just concentrate on this stampede to get married. Place yer bets!
Who do you think will sprint -- I mean, walk -- down the aisle first?
Image via Joo Eun Song/Flickr