20 Signs He's Not Over His Ex

OMG 15

I don't know how many times I've heard "don't date a guy who's just broken up with someone." No one wants to be the rebound girl. Not only is it hard on YOU, it can be just as hard on him, as he's trying to heal from his breakup.

But sometimes, you find yourself breaking the rules, liking a guy who has just split up with his last partner, and you go with it. It feels right. So you do it.

Sometimes? It works out just fine -- the relationship between your partner and his ex was long over and the breakup was an inevitability. 

Other times, he clearly hasn't moved on. Here are some obvious and not-so-obvious signs that he's not quite over his ex.

1) He still lists his relationship status as "In a relationship" or "It's complicated" on Facebook.

2) Her picture is everywhere -- including his computer screen saver. 

3) He compares her to you, and not always in your favor.

4) He's still got her programmed in his phone as "Girlfriend" (or similar pet names).

5) His parents refer to you as "The other one. You know, who's not [insert name of ex]."

6) They're always texting, Tweeting, IM-ing each other.

7) He throws celebrations in her honor. 

8) He can't stop complaining about her. 

9) He calls her first with any important news.

10) They still go to his parents' house for dinner a couple of times a month.

11) He's furious that she's dating someone new.

12) Every other comment on her Facebook wall is from him.

13) He's her go-to for help around the house, help programming the DVR, and any tech support needs she might have. 

14) He manages to bring her up in nearly every conversation.

15) His work friends don't know who you are, but they do know his ex.

16) When he mentions her, it's always about his love of or spite for her.

17) He saves all her texts -- from six months ago.

18) He hasn't introduced you to his friends.

19) He suggests that you make friends with her.

20) He slips up pretty often and calls you by her name.

What are some other signs he's not over his ex?

Image via eliazar/Flickr

dating, exes


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

paren... parentalrights1

Lol I don't know how much I came up in conversation when my ex started dating someone else, but it must have been alot because those idiots were constantly showing up at my job just to hug and kiss in front of my work station. Then (she was a senior in high school) when he took her to her prom they drove all the way up to where I worked just so they could walk a lap around my department in their prom clothes and walk out :|

Yeah. It was funny. And he's the one that broke up with me, supposedly because he wasn't ready for a big commitment so it wasn't that I did something he was trying to piss me off for.

So basically. If he's still talking about or driving up to see his ex just to show you off to her, that doesn't mean you're a huge prize that she should be jealous of. It means she's still occupying waaaaaay too much of his mind.

Stephanie Aguilar

why are these so OBVIOUS that he's not over his ex?? Every example here, if a girl doesn't realize it, they are plain stupid.

nonmember avatar Liz

I think a lot of these can be indications of anger and resentment of an ex that royally screws you over. I had an ex that was verbally, emotionally, and physically abusive and, for awhile, when anyone would complain about their relationship, he would always come to mind. Did I have feelings for him still? Absolutely not. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't have like to bash his face in.

jessi... jessicasmom1

hmm.. glad to say my man does none of this but blocks her everywhere :-) not sure if that is a good sign or not .. I can only be who I am for him.

Texas... TexasWife

He will stop having sex with you to answer her call. Yeah I didn't stay in that relationship. That was the first and only sign he gave me.

Saphi... SaphireLiz

My hubby was way over his last ex b/c she got rid of him but once he got with me she wouldn't leave him alone threatening to commit suicide if he didn't come back to her and all he said " was go for it see what I care". He was and still is very happy and in love with me and didn't care about her

nonmember avatar Smoovious

When she can't stop herself from bringing up some of the things she enjoyed doing while having sex with her ex, and mentioning the ex, while we're in the middle of having sex.

Total turnoff...

Seems like a pretty obvious sign to me.

Broke up with her the next day. Ugh...

-- Smoov

Angela Amos Dreiman

These were all pretty blatant, how about he secretly call/texts/IMs her all the time. Or he still emails her. Some guys are not as obvious as the things you listed here.

nonmember avatar rockyroad

I left my ex 3 yrs. ago after 31 yrs. of marriage (I should have left him twenty yrs. sooner.) He is still wearing his wedding band.

1-10 of 15 comments 12 Last