8 Things NOT to Do on a First Date (If You Want a Second)

asparagusOh, the joys of dating. The extreme anxiety, the self-doubt, the need to check your inbox in the middle of the night just to see if anyone in particular has responded ... it can be a passive-aggressive romp through personal hell.

Then again, I hear it can also be a wonderful adventure that will lead you to your soul mate. Lovely prospect, I suppose.

So if you're looking to meet your match, maybe there are a few things you should know before going on your next first date. After all, if you do it right, it could be your last. Here are 8 things never to do on a first date if, that is, you want a second.

More from The Stir: 5 Extremely Valuable Dating Tips From Men

  1. Do not mention that your arms are really sore from carrying Costco-size bags of cat food for blocks and blocks because you're too poor to take a cab.
  2. Do not talk about how your doctor says you don't have gluten allergy? But you feel like you do? And you haven't eaten bread in, like, so long? Because you feel like you totally know you have Celiac disease no matter what the tests show?
  3. If there's asparagus on the plate, I know it's tempting, but do not talk about asparagus pee. Like, just don't.
  4. Everyone knows that you shouldn't talk about your ex on a first date, but not everyone knows that you shouldn't talk about that poor ex-cuse for a mother that you have. Don't bring up your innermost family issues. Too soon.
  5. So you just had some dental work done and you may think that your gum grafting is super interesting, but it's not. No one cares how much you spent on it, either.
  6. Do not mention how your and your friends' motto for the summer is ABMO. Always Be Making Out. It doesn't really send the message that you're ready to get serious.
  7. Feeling like that pesky cold sore might resurface any day now? Keep that info to yourself.
  8. It's great that you know all the lyrics to Emily's raps on The Bachelor, but please, please, do not mention A) The Bachelor, B) that you've memorized lines from a reality show.

What are your no-nos for first dates?


Photo via jamesonf/Flickr



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nonmember avatar Ksu student

"7.Feeling like that pesky cold sore might resurface any day now? Keep that info to yourself."
... Reminds me of the laws about disclosure and HIV. I would be highly upset to find out after kissing all last night, that my date had cold sores!

In the best interest of the public, there should be laws on the books too for all std disclosures!

Desti... Destiny907

Never ever wear a tube top! Just screams "BOOTY CALL and NOthiNG more"

nonmember avatar Tasha

Do NOT talk about your ex's!!

Celti... Celtic_Dragon

Since when is having cold sores an STD? It is passed on by sharing drinking cups as well as kissing! You can get it as a child!!!

Elizabeth Gronewald

I would be highly upset if someone did not tell me they had coldsores and I started getting them. Embarrassing as it would be, I would tell someone if I had the capability of passing on a lifelong virus that crops up whenever it likes. It is common courtesy.

Elizabeth Gronewald

Plus the sores can crop up on your genitals if you have unprotected oral sex with a person who has them. Please tell me, Celtic_Dragon, that you would disclose that fact if you were going to give oral sex if you had coldsores. It doesn't matter how you get the virus to some people. It would matter more if they had sores on their genitals at random times in their lives because soneone thought it wasn't pertinent information.

nonmember avatar fifi1234

I do not like it when a guy talks about sex at all on the first couple of dates. I really would like it if he refrained from it until he wants to get serious which could be a month or so down the road. It feels like he is a horny toad in hopes of getting sex from you because you are on a date with him instead of because he wants you and only you.

nonmember avatar joe bassett

Unless you are a talker do go on a double date. You can have stuff to talk about. If you sit there and say nothing you will not get a second date. If you are dull and boring take another couple.

kisse... kisses5050

there are no rules for a first date... you should trust your instincts and be yourself. the only rule is " I have something contagious so I am not pass it to you"

Alicia Curione

The author mentions not to discuss your ex or you mom. But I have to say that complaining about work is no better. This always makes me think that the date is looking for a way to live off of others. That may not be the case, but it definitely makes you think twice about that person. Kisses5050 made one statement that I have to agree with. Being yourself is the best way to be on a date.  

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