50 'Surprising' Qualities Women Really Want In a Man

Hot List 31

man's shadowThere are some basic things women feel are the most important qualities a man must have when looking for a mate. Things like a sense of humor, must be attractive (to that woman), some smarts, and of course together you must have that spark to ignite the bed sheets into a smoldering pile of hot sexiness.

But there are other things us women want that we may not readily admit to yet can be a deal-breaker. I asked many women from all over the country about what they really want in a man. Some of these qualities may surprise some men, but I think all of us ladies have at least some of these on our 'list.'

  1. Chest hair. Not back hair, and not hairy all over his body. Just chest hair.
  2. Nice teeth. And must have all of them.
  3. Good looking feet.
  4. A guy who can be social with strangers.
  5. Must love his mom.
  6. Someone who doesn't drive like a psycho.
  7. A guy who puts gas in my car and washes instead of giving me flowers.
  8. Large hands.
  9. Soft hands. Definitely not sandpaper hands but not too squishy either.
  10. Someone who is willing to cook, even if he sucks at it.
  11. A guy who is willing to wear a princess crown in public if his daughter asks him to.
  12. Respect for women as equals.
  13. Broad shoulders.
  14. An intact penis.
  15. A circumcised penis.
  16. Geekiness with intelligence.
  17. A guy with good Joss Whedon knowledge.
  18. Someone who can play instruments and/or sing well.
  19. A man who is eager to please.
  20. Someone who doesn't freak out if I fart in front of him.
  21. Good endurance in the tongue muscle.
  22. A man who isn't squeamish.
  23. A guy who isn't ashamed to be both student and teacher.
  24. Someone who isn't afraid to kill bugs (or trap them and release them humanely).
  25. A guy who rides a motorcycle.
  26. Someone who knows how to drive stick.
  27. Must love pets.
  28. Someone who has the patience to learn how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.
  29. Someone who can fix things around the house.
  30. A man who lets me do whatever I want to him ... sexually.
  31. An ability to be spontaneous. Especially sexually.
  32. A guy who can pick up and go to a park for a picnic in an hour's notice.
  33. Strength of character, besides his physical strength.
  34. A man who knows how to operate firearms.
  35. A guy who will be a babywearing kind of dad.
  36. Someone who isn't afraid to say 'I love you.'
  37. A hand holder.
  38. A door opener.
  39. A guy who reads books.
  40. A man who is taller than me.
  41. A man who weighs more than me.
  42. Someone whose thumbs aren't glued to his phone all the time.
  43. A gamer, willing to play with me.
  44. A guy who can go to the mall and into all the stores I want to go in and not complain.
  45. A man who isn't afraid to get a pedicure with me.
  46. Strong thighs.
  47. A guy who looks at me when I talk and really listens.
  48. Someone who knows how to dress sharp.
  49. A man who knows when he's wrong and can say sorry.
  50. A man who can say "whatever you want, you're the boss" and he isn't being sarcastic or condescending.

How many of these things would make your list?

 

Image via Walt Stoneburner/Flickr

love, marriage, turn-ons

31 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

the4m... the4mutts

Maybe only 5 of these make my personal list. Wearing the crown in public, being good to pets *and waiters!* not driving like a psycho, killing bugs, and not caring if I fart.

The rest of this particular list, is unimportant to me. The superficial ones especially. Thighs? Height? Penis un/cut? Doesn't matter to me.

Sierr... SierraLynn

Why are these 'surprising'? They are typical qualities women look for in men.

Mommy... MommyOfOne2710

Uncircumsized? Lol, that's a US thing. There was a study saying that women outside of the US usually prefer uncircumcised, especially Europeans. Not sure why that's even on the list...



There are other ones on this list that are totally ridiculous as well.

nonmember avatar blh

Most of them or i agree with except the hairy chest (yuck) and the gamer.

jonellg jonellg

Unciercumsized made the list because this IS America goober.

nonmember avatar mrhappy

another list os male qualities all women want. and this one made me laugh and roll my eyes like all the other one.

this list is rubbish.

no wonder soooo many women are having difficulties with dating, they read ridculous "lists" that an actual man will never meet. and most of whats listed here are HUMAN qualities. the gf read this and thought it was stupid.

mande... manderspanders

Yea, this list is fairly superficial. After a bad marriage to an emotionally and verbally abusive cheater, I had to step back and re-evaluate my priorities. I wanted a man who was a man's man, tall (only because I'm 6ft tall), had traditional family values, loved his mom, and had patience and integrity.  Things that I used to think that were important such as education, social status, liking the outdoors, common interests etc etc weren't really that important in finding a life partner.  I always used to think that I couldn't stand a "hairy" man...  But it wasn't until I decided that those things were unimportant that I found my gem of a husband with the core qualities in a package much different from what I would have ever considered: he's tall, overweight, lots of body hair, educated but underemployed, and with interests very different from mine.  He took care of his dying mother, helped raise his brother, is kind and patient, and a sports fanatic. He's the love of my life and the things I thought might be dealbreakers don't even matter.


Ya know, women complain about not being able to find a good enough man, but the fact of the matter is that lists like these keep women from thinking outside the box and really looking at the core qualities important to a relationship instead of the superficial ones.


You'd give up on a great guy because he has too much body hair or a circumcized penis? REALLY?

nonmember avatar Emme

I always thought baldness, ugly hands or ugly feet were deal breakers but, 'lo and behold, my husband is balding (and in one of the worst ways possible) and has the ugliest feet I've ever seen.

These lists are more for fun than anything else. Anyone who really abides by them will probably be very lonely and unhappy.

rturn... rturner79

I can't believe being a great kisser isn't on this list!

nonmember avatar Amy

A man who will be a partner and treat me like a partner, not an unpaid housekeeper. A man who, if we diveroce, will be fair and honest and make sure the kids and I are taken care of.

1-10 of 31 comments 1234 Last