My Valentine's Brunch Date With a Potential 'Serial Killer'

Love & Learn 11

broken heartWhat you are about to read are horrifying tales of love gone wrong just in time for Valentine's Day. Welcome to Dating Horror Story Week on The Stir ...

Like most women my age, I've had my share of bad dates. There was the guy who asked me at the START of our dinner date whether I wanted to box up half my pizza so I didn't eat it all at once. There was the other guy who on our first date got drunk and slurrily serenaded me via karaoke in front of the whole bar. But my date with the guy I'm about to tell you about will forever go down in history -- at least in my friends' circle -- as the worst EVER.

Here's what happened:

*Some names have been changed to protect the identities of the main characters in this story.

I met *Sven on a trip to IKEA. He asked my opinion on a new couch for his living room, and we spent the next hour sitting on said couch swapping stories about life, love, and home furnishings. When he asked me to have brunch with him on that next Saturday, I immediately said yes. He was cute, driven, funny, and easy-going. I liked him ... very much.

As luck would have it, that next Saturday was Valentine's Day, and so I was breaking one of my cardinal life rules: Never go out on Valentine's Day (it's crowded with awkward couples, and there's too much pressure in general). Yet, I was willing to make an exception for this guy. As I said, there was just something about him that I really liked.

I arrived at the agreed upon time and brunch place with excited butterflies. Sven and I had chatted via email throughout the week, and I was really looking forward to our date. The brunch place was packed and noisy (see what I mean about Valentine's Day?) and the server sat us at the tiniest of tables smack dab in the middle of the restaurant. We were rubbing elbows with about seven other couples if you can imagine it.

We ordered, and once mugs of coffee arrived, we settled into comfortable, flirty conversation. I was having a great time. Until ...

Suddenly, Sven grabbed my hand and said that he "had to tell me something important." His long monologue started off sweet -- he's so glad he met me and he was enjoying spending time with me. But then he took a strange turn: He knew it was crazy, but he thought we were soul mates. He also knew we'd be together for the rest of our lives.

He was so intense that the couples around us started to stare. Me? Yeah, I started to sweat from every body part that had a gland. But it was his next statement that sent me -- and everyone else in the restaurant -- completely over the edge.

I feel so strongly about you and that we need to be together. Even if you had no arms and no legs and were a stump in a basket, we would be together.

I swear to god, the entire noisy restaurant fell completely silent.

Honestly, if someone I was in a long, committed relationship had a similar sentiment and told me in a more private setting -- and was able to communicate it in a way that didn't insult people with disabilities -- I would have thought it was really sweet. As it was, I had only known the guy for a couple hours. And, I couldn't get the scenes from Boxing Helena out of my head.

Obviously, I survived my brunch date with a maybe serial killer (I have our wonderful server who immediately appeared with the check and a getaway cab that miraculously appeared on the corner to thank for that). Now that I've had some time to recover and reflect, it occurs to me that it's likely Sven just had an awkward moment with me and is completely normal and happily married with a bunch of happy kids. Probably it's time to let it go, especially now that I've made him the subject of a blog post.

But I'll be DAMNED if I ever venture out on Valentine's Day again.

More Dating Horror Stories:

My Date With the Violent Blue-Eyed Boy

My Date With a Sexual Harasser Who Lived in His Mom's Basement

My Gut-Wrenching Date With a Gold-Digging Guy

What was your worst date?


Image via katerha/Flickr

dating, turn-offs


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

Runne... Runnergirl6

I would have been *accidentally* dumping my coffee on him at mention of the word 'soul-mate' so props to you for handling it as well as you did!

I'm sorry, that's just weird thing to say, especially on the first date.

Bullet dodged imo. :)

nonmember avatar jac

Double date from hell! The guy spent the entire time berating the waitstaff & generally being a complete dick. I drank way too much that evening in an attempt to make him more tolerable. So most of the evening is hazy. It was what happened a few days later that really made it bad. He met my ex at a party &, not knowing who my ex was (now my husband) proceeded to complain about going on a date with the biggest bitch on the face of the earth. And he claimed to have smacked me around. Ex bf was pissed.

Susie19 Susie19

Went on a date for ice cream with some guy I thought was very cute...BUT he wouldn't stop talking about his ex girlfriend asking me if I knew her, I said no, so he proceeded to describe her to me as the most beautiful girl in the world with pretty greenish eyes and lovely curly hair and blah, blah, blah!!!!  OMG it was sooo annoying and i felt so uncomfortable, I couldn't eat my ice cream fast enough so I could leave already!  >:(

Yashi... Yashica23

Went on a date with a neighbor. Date was nice until he asked if he could pay me $50 for sex. He said "since you're a single mother you can use it to buy groceries, it's a win win." My response "I'm not for sell but if I was it would cost more than $50, I spend more than that on a new purse, being single does not equal poor... but thanks."

nonmember avatar Mel

About like yours. A guy I talked to for an hour and then maybe 6 hours on the phone during a week purposed to me in the drive thru of Arby's.

nonmember avatar Mel

About like yours. A guy I talked to for an hour and then maybe 6 hours on the phone during a week purposed to me in the drive thru of Arby's.

cherylam cherylam

worst date?  Nothing like these for sure... met a guy on, met him for coffee, he sked me to go for dinner aat a nearby resturant, drove there in my car, he in his.  Dinner was nice, he seemed a gentle soul, kind hearted, etc.  Check came and he slid it over to me, saying, ' I'll catch the next one' with a wink... I paid the check and gladly went home.  He emailed a couple days later and asked me to go for brunch after I came home from church on Sunday.  We went to brunch at a local resturant and he did pay for the meal.  It was the last time I saw him... met DH that afternoon and the rest is history.

MegTh... MegTheGem

Doesn't sound serial killer-ish to me (and I'm full of "useless" serial killer knowledge due to how much I read about them). A very disturbed individual, yes. Serial killer? Over-dramatics.

nonmember avatar Joanieb

met one horror story on one site, he turned out to be the biggest druggy drunk on earth, he died on his 60th birthday of an overdose but I hadn't known him then...second one took advantage of my widowhood by stealing things from my cellar that were very expensive tools of my late husband's, not knowing what my husband had down there, my nephews discovered it. Third time's the charm, met the most wonderful man on earth and have been with him for 5-1/2 years, the love of my life. He on the other hand went out with a woman who wanted to meet in his city b/c she said her husband died under mysterious circumstances...yikes he never saw her again

ltf124 ltf124

i had a lunch date then a movie after. only met the guy just a day before. we were having a great time until he asked me why i didn't want to have anymore kids. i proceed to explain. he wanted me to meet his family the next day and pretty much be knocked up with his baby soon after. he started to cry at the table in front of everybody, and i mean like boo hoo crying loud. i stopped eating and just looked down. i didn't want to see others reaction. we never made it to the movie.

1-10 of 11 comments 12 Last