I generally don’t watch reality TV, mostly because I’m content to have graduated from the phase of my own life that was riddled with drama. So there’s no feasible reason why I’d want to be a voyeur to someone else’s beefs, squabbles, and falling outs, which seem to be the major selling points of just about every show.
That being said, I have seen an episode or two of The Family Hustle on VH1, and it’s actually pretty cute.
One thing I’ve consistently noticed — on the show and in their interviews and just about every time I see them together — is that T.I. is definitely, without a doubt, head of the relationship, to the point I’d call him controlling. Did you see them on the Wendy Williams Show last month? (Howyoudoin, by the way? I love me some Wendy!)
Anyway, watch how he intercepts this question directed at her:
The audience likes it. I guess they’re hooting and hollering for the take-charge, alpha male persona. Apparently they’re fans of manly men who operate in a me-Tarzan-you-Jane kind of way. But I had to give the situation a slow head shake.
If I were her, my man would have one, maybe two times to cut me off and offer up thoughts on my behalf before I pulled him into the green room and gave him a little pep talk about me having a fully functioning mind and mouth of my own. But alas, that’s not Tiny’s M.O.
Here’s the whole interview in case you missed it.
This isn’t an isolated incident. I’ve heard Tiny say, on several occasions in several arenas, that T.I. doesn’t want her to work even though she’s gunning to get back into music. I see from the show that she’s eeked out permission to launch a nail bar with a partner, but I suspect that everything she does, even from a professional perspective, needs to have the T.I. stamp of approval on it before it can get off the tarmac.
As pro-girl power womanist as I am, I’m OK with the idea of a man being the head of a family. There should be a strong partnership between both people in the relationship, don’t get me wrong. Lord strike me down right here and now if I ever get caught up in some obsequious, my-husband-calls-all-the-shots scenario. (I think The Boyfriend can attest that chances of that happening are LeAnn Rimes slim.) But I do believe if you marry a good man, there’s no harm in allowing him to make major decisions for the lot of you.
That said, I’ve got a voice and I’m darn sure gonna use it.
Whatever works for Tiny and T.I. They’ve been together forever, though I suspect that’s largely because she’s that ride-or-die chick who’s down for her man no matter how many times he gets locked up, how many mistakes he makes, or how many times he robs her of the ability to think an original thought (even though, let’s be honest, Tiny ain’t gunning to be a philosopher any time soon).
What are some sure signs a man is controlling?