Man Gives Cheating Girlfriend Worst Tattoo in History

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There are some days when you feel like you have heard it all, and then you hear something so insane, so outrageous, and so totally out there that you realize you've heard nothing at all. Well, the poop tattoo story is kind of like that for me. 

The story (which may or may not be an Internet hoax) is this: A woman cheated on her tattoo artist boyfriend with his close friend. He acted like it was all cool (even though he knew). He offered her a back tattoo alleged to be a picture of Narnia, which would have been lame enough on its own. But this guy gave her something else instead. If you're thinking that he tattooed a steaming pile of poo replete with flies buzzing around it ... then you are right, my friends. He did.

Now she is (allegedly) suing him for $100,000, but I say, if she was really cheating, then she deserved it.

Apparently, tattoo artist Ryan L. Fitzjerald of Dayton, Ohio plied his ex Rossie Brovent with tequila shots and got her to sign a waiver claiming she was OK with whatever he decided to put on her back. Apparently this included steaming piles of human (it's human, right?) waste. Aw, yeah.

Oh how I hope this is a true story.

Look, if this is not a hoax and Brovent was cheating with Fitzjerald's friend, then she shouldn't have trusted him to tattoo her back. And if she wasn't, well, that sucks for her. But it's a really funny story.

In his defense, the tat could be a candle with butterflies around it. It could be something totally else, right? I mean, the stink lines could be heat waves if you look at it a different way. Who am I kidding? If I were Brovent, I would probably get it lasered off, too. But it's hardly as if she is blameless in this.

I, for one, have learned a few valuable love lessons in all this:

1.) If I cheat, be discreet and don't get a tattoo by the man I am cuckolding. 

2.) If I get a tattoo on my back, bring a double mirror.

3.) If I have a poop tattoo, accept that I probably deserved it and move on.

Now that we have cleared these love lessons up, we can get back to laughing. Now I really have heard it all.

Do you think she deserved the poop tattoo?

 

Image via LadyDragonflyCC -TY for 250,000 Views/Flickr

cheating, tattoos

208 Comments

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Kritika Kritika

She may have deserved it but he abused his license. It should be revoked.

Rachel Schiller

No one deserves that. Would she deserve having her ear or nose cut off, too?

Lynette Lynette

no one deserves that

chigi... chigirl1228

Did she deserve it? Probably not...but its fricken hilarious none the less. What a creative jaded man lol.

brand... brandspanknnew

Revoking his license is dumb, she signed a consent, cutting off noses and ears? That's probably the dumbest comment EVER to a tattoo article. Has nothing to do with this. Did she deserve it? Probably not because we all make mistakes, but there are people who take it too far, she should have used more caution. This is revenge at it's sweetest.

SandM... SandMsMama

that picture has been floating around the internet for a while. are you sure you did your research properly on this??

Kritika Kritika

I think there is a law protecting people that sign things under the influence. I don't remember it but we talked about it in my business law class.

hotic... hoticedcoffee

Deserve it?  Probably not.  Hilarious?  Oh yeah.

Craft... CraftyJenna

I don't have much sympathy for cheaters- she really should have known better than to let him tattoo her. And if this tattoo is so large, I can't belive she never once took a break to look at it. My husband is a tattoo artist and I am heavily tattooed, it's not a quick process to get large tattoos, and it's not like it's painless. If he tattooed her while she was passed out or against her will I would say she has a case, but this sounds like the girl who got the stars tattooed over her face then claimed the tattoo artist did it while she was asleep (Here's a pro tip, the only way you are going to be asleep is if you are under anesthesia, I've seen people on percocet cry and being under the influence actually makes pain worse) I wouldn't put it past her to have wanted somethign like that and now has buyers remorse, she wouldn't be the first person to intentially get poop tattooed on themselves. Hell, she wouldn't even be the 10th.

cmari... cmarie452

She signed a waiver when she was drunk: you can't sign consent forms when you're drunk and have them be valid.  You have to be sound of mind (which you obviously aren't when you're drunk) for that waiver to be valid in a court of law.  She may have cheated but she didn't deserve that.  I know this article is trying to be funny but it's not, it just makes the writer look mean-spirited.    Cheating sucks but no one deserves that just for cheating.  Tattoos are permanent unless you have thousands of dollars to have them lasered off.  He should have his license revoked and pay to have it removed.  Just because he's a jilted boyfriend doesn't mean he has a right to take his revenge however he wants, even if you find it "hilarious".

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