Halloween is only a week away and the kids have long had their costumes settled, so it's about time my husband and I decided on ours.

I scoured the Internet this week for inspiration, but instead of finding the perfect costumes for our neighborhood party, I found 10 that would probably get us arrested ...

Warning: Some pretty hilariously racy stuff going on below, so make sure there are no unwanted eyeballs around.

1. Genie in the Lamp. C'mon kids, make a wish.

2. The Penthouse Pinup. Something for little girls everywhere to aspire to!

3. An M&M. It's been a while since I've had an M&M, but this is hardly what I remember them looking like.

4. Snake Charmer. I can say with absolute certainty that I have never seen a more frightening snake.

5. Katy Perry. Unless you actually are Katy Perry, don't go dressing like this. Actually, even if you are Katy Perry, maybe you should reconsider.

6. Borat. The thought of my husband in this is almost too much to bear.

7. Caught in the Act. Probably the most terrifying scene a kid can imagine.

8. Sexy Cop. What better way to get your child to respect authority than show up in this?

9. Zombie-Doctor. Kids aren't scared enough of the doctor? This will do the trick!

10. I Don't Want To Grow Up. The stuff nightmares are made of. For all of us.

Which one is your favorite?