Strong Marriages Can & Should Survive Sexual Betrayal

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For many, an affair is a deal-breaker. It's the end of the relationship, a sign that the spouses need to move on, and a black and white issue with little recourse. But in longer marriages, especially when kids are involved, infidelity doesn't have to end the marriage. Some marriages can recover.

A website called Affair Recovery offers couples the chance to test what kind of affair they had using the "affair analyzer" software and then decide whether the marriage can be saved.

The fact is, there ARE all different kinds of affairs.

A woman (or man) who is serially unfaithful or falls in love with the other person may not be able to move on in his or her marriage. It may have been a way to get out of the marriage in the first place.

But affairs aren't always that. Sometimes they happen because the people are neglecting one another or too busy or fighting a lot. Sometimes they happen because one person is restless or bored.

Whatever the reason, they don't have to be a deal-breaker. Personally, my husband would have to openly leave me for another woman for me to end our marriage over an affair. It's just not worth it to me to lose him over something that feels small in the scheme of things. If he was truly sorry and willing to work on things, I think we could recover and be stronger for it, especially if it were only a one-night stand. 

There are worse things people do to one another in marriages that are far more devastating than a momentary lapse in judgement that leads to sex with another person.

How about you? Do you think you could forgive an affair?

 

Image via denharsh/Flickr

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