After reading about surrogate sex partners, I'm now dying to meet one at a party. Not because I want to sleep with one (geez!), but because they must be some of the most interesting, open-minded people on the planet. That's what I hope anyway, because if these trained sex professionals are just horned up dirty hippies trying to get legally paid for having sex, then really I'm not interested. Been there, done that.
OK so assuming the sex surrogate business and its alliance under the International Professional Surrogate Association (ISPA) is a legit practice that only has the best intentions of helping patients work through intense intimacy issues, I'm all for it. That said, it's understandably controversial.
The ISPA has been around since the '70s (you don't say) and started with about 300 members, but has dwindled down to about 50. But apparently, the demand for male surrogates is on the rise as an increased number of women have sought the unorthodox help of a surrogate.
A sex surrogate isn't just about sex, though. While some treatment will include having intercourse, it can also just be about making eye contact, holding hands, laying naked together. For some women who were sexually abused by a family member, surrogates are a safe way to learn how to not fear men and how to love.
I'll admit that it sounds a bit hippie-dippie to me ... I can only picture surrogates that look like Barbra Streisand in Meet the Fockers. But if surrogacy helps people, it helps people. And it's not like surrogates are being forced on patients, it's got to be consensual. Though many sex therapists say they'd never prescribe a surrogate, arguing that a sexual encounter won't "cure" them of their fears or anxieties, I say that if there are people out there who've suffered sexual trauma and need the help of a surrogate, may the force be with them.
I don't see anything wrong with pursuing a healthier and happier life, even if the treatment is contentious. In my opinion, physical therapy and emotional therapy are sometimes better options than medicinal therapies.
What do you think?
Photo via je@n/Flickr