A few of my friends are fed up with their singleness enough to venture into the world of online dating. I have nothing but respect for their gumption and have been cheerleading loud and proud from the sidelines. (Better them than me, though.)
So far, the profiles haven’t yielded much more than good entertainment. There are some guys who seem to think it’s appropriate to have bare-chested profile pictures with their taco meat on full display. Is that supposed to be enticing, sir? It’s actually somewhere between ridiculously funny and just plain ol’ awkward.
Sad as I’d be to let that kind of hilarity slip through my fingers, I keep telling them: Match.com may be cool, eHarmony might be alright, but don’t sleep on Facebook. Yep, for dating. Hey, why not? I’ve had pretty good success with it so far.
Two summers ago, after I drug myself out of a marathon relationship with the beloved man who wouldn’t ask me to marry him, I spent a lot of time on Facebook. OK, OK, I was as close to being addicted as 99 is to 100. But it was so fun. I caught up with old friends from undergrad and high school — heck, even elementary school — and started making a lot of idle chit chat with a guy I’d only known around the way back in college.
He was a Que, those wild frat boys who bark and wear the purple and gold, for those who don’t know. He was from Philly. And that’s about all I’d known about him beforehand. But somehow, we clicked on Facebook. My snarky sense of humor seeped out into my status updates and he, who was also fluent in the language of smart aleck, always had a comment to volley back at me. Pretty soon, those interactions turned into a chance to sharpen my post-breakup flirting skills.
I remember posting a status once asking if it was possible to have a crush on one of your Facebook friends just from talking on the site. I swear I had barely clicked “share” on that thing before my first comment popped up, from him of course. And it said “definitely yes.” It was on and poppin’ after that. His code name between me and my friends became Facebook Crush, shortened to FBC for super-covert operations.
That little social media mash-up didn’t last long. We dated for about six months, but could feel myself falling. Daydreaming about him. Wanting to see him more often than our casual relationship called for. He, on the other hand, made it crystal clear that he was not looking for a girlfriend any time soon. I thought my natural loveability would eventually draw him in. And that’s the portion of the story that we call “Learning the Hard Way.”
That didn’t mean I was down for the count, though. And that sure didn’t mean I stayed my hot little fingers off The Book. I flexed my flirtation muscle with other guys I knew but soon got another regular, another dude I’d gone to college with. I remember seeing him around campus, I knew he was another Philly boy, and I knew he didn’t seem anything close to being my type.
Still, I flirted my way into a first date with the new Facebook dude on his home turf, which consisted of him cooking me dinner and me kicking his natural brown tail at the batting cages afterwards. But there was no spark. Nice guy, no magic.
My best friend pressed me to be open-minded. My “type” wasn’t working out for me too tough, so I needed to branch out a little bit. According to her, a lot. So I let him plan a second date in DC, where I lived two hours away. And on top of taking me roller skating (which I love) and to Five Guys (which I love), he brought me a compact of my favorite MAC powder. I’d been to the store the week before and mentioned that they were out of my shade. He found out which one I wore and brought one to me.
Boy oh boy, am I glad I listened to my bestie.
Almost two years later, he’s still impressing me. He surprised me by trying to make homemade Jack Daniels sauce last night. The majesty of Facebook has since worn off but the little love affair that sprouted because of it? I hope it’s endless. The moral of the story: if you’re open to online dating, make good use of social media. And it’s free!
Would you date someone you met on a social media site?
Image via suez92/Flickr